Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for June 11, 2012

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    Peabody-Martini  almost 13 years ago

    Sometimes you have to be subtle to make your point.

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  2. Idano
    Ida No  almost 13 years ago

    Or, Marge could simply put a coin lock on all the doors during 1/2 price beer happy hour. $5 to get into the toilet, $2 to get out to the street.

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    cleokaya  almost 13 years ago

    My friend bought a persuader shotgun. The name says it all.

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  4. Chris88
    chireef  almost 13 years ago

    i wonder if she owns the book ā€œhow to serve manā€

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  5. Birthcontrol
    Dtroutma  almost 13 years ago

    She panned his performance.

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  6. Stewiebrian
    pouncingtiger  almost 13 years ago

    In other words, tip or else!

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    Varnes  almost 13 years ago

    Um, the cook, in the diner, with the tomato surprise,ā€¦.

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    Varnes  almost 13 years ago

    I hope he was spatula slappedā€¦Federal minimum wage for waitresses. $2.13ā€¦ā€¦Michigan, $2.65ā€¦AZ, $4.55, Idaho, $3.35ā€¦$2.77 in Washington D.C. But those guys donā€™t just give a tip, the give you the whole thingā€¦ā€¦repeatedlyā€¦ā€¦from behindā€¦..

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    Varnes  almost 13 years ago

    Seriously, waiters and waitresses and bartenders are the best folks in the world. (Especially bartendersā€¦urp!) Most of them are putting themselves through school, or putting shoes on their kidā€™s feetā€¦.Hearts of gold folksā€¦please tip them well. Remember, instead of sittinā€™ around waiting for a hand out, there they are, .serving you. Thatā€™s right. SERVING YOU your breakfast in the morning, when itā€™s still hard for you to focusā€¦.Please tip them well, not only do they deserve itā€¦ā€¦ā€¦.Iā€™ll be watchingā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦ā€¦..with my spatulaā€¦.

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    stripseeker  almost 13 years ago

    It seems that somewhere along the way, someone required the enhanced version of persuasion.

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  11. Glen with cheesesteak
    philyfanstukinmi  almost 13 years ago

    Is this Tipper Goreā€™s place?

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    spehnec  almost 13 years ago

    Not getting my email!

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  13. Packrat
    Packratjohn Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    Reminds me of ā€œSupport Your Local Sheriffā€. The Sheriff (James Garner) couldnā€™t afford bars for his jail cells, so he dribbled red paint on the floor. When the bad guy asked what the red stain on the floor was, he was told, ā€œThatā€™s the last guy who tried to escape.ā€

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  14. Packrat
    Packratjohn Premium Member almost 13 years ago

    I think you meant, ā€œcommensurateā€. Although, come to think of it, we might commiserate with the wait staff and tip them as we would like to be tipped.

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    Ermine Notyours  almost 13 years ago

    Iā€™m surprised Archie McPheeā€™s doesnā€™t sell a Tip Meter. Itā€™s like a taxi meter only the price goes in reverse, displayed under a sign saying ā€œYour tip.ā€ Bet it would be a big hit in the really fancy restaurants.

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    hcr1985  almost 13 years ago

    encouraged, as in ā€œdo it or die!!!ā€

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  17. Lonelemming
    Ernest Lemmingway  almost 13 years ago

    Whatā€™s the difference between a cheapskate and a canoe? A canoe tips.

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  18. Large blue morning
    Yakety Sax  almost 13 years ago

    Nothing like good old cast iron to get someones attention!

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  19. Birthcontrol
    Dtroutma  almost 13 years ago

    I grew up working in my folkā€™s restaurants, and cooked for cash until I went in the Army. I only tip appropriate to the SERVICE. If itā€™s good, I tip VERY well, if not ,well: once got TERRIBLE service, the change from dinner for four was two cents. I left it on the table and the ā€œwaitressā€ bitched about her ā€œtipā€, I just told her, ā€œItā€™s twice what youā€™r worthā€.

    It DOES mean ā€œTo Insure Proper Serviceā€.

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    KEA  almost 13 years ago

    i think you mean commensurate ā€“ otherwise theyā€™re just crying together

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    KEA  almost 13 years ago

    well at the least the Restrooms sign isnā€™t in some silly theme code

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    Gokie5  almost 13 years ago

    Canā€™t resist commenting on the WORST service I ever got,about twenty-five years ago. (Usually my servers are great.) A young man who looked like the son of the manager or something took my order for spaghetti and water. (Usually I got minestrone, but felt flush.) Then a large party of young people came in and ordered. He got the spaghetti to me, but not the water. The young people got their wine and food in abundance. Later he came to check on me and asked if I needed anything. I said, pleasantly enough, I hope, ā€œSome water would be nice.ā€ No water. Finally I went to the kitchen, peered around the corner, and there he was. I said, ā€œCan you PLEASE bring some water?ā€ Of course he couldnā€™t. When I left I sought him out and gave him down the country, and didnā€™t leave any tip (wish Iā€™d left a penny). I also wish thereā€™d been the Internet back then. Guess I ought to give it up and let it stop poisoning my soul.

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  23. Spooky
    unca jim  almost 13 years ago

    When I was ā€˜coming up,ā€™ I did the food service route and served people well. Nowadays, when I go out to eat with company, I let the server/waiter/waitress know that Iā€™ve walked in their shoes and ā€œplease donā€™t ā€˜hoverā€™ ..if somethingā€™s wrong, youā€™ll know soon enough.ā€ Just to catch their eye and a head-nod is signal enough. And at gas prices these days, a 20% tip is enough to cover their ā€œgetting to work tomorrowā€ expense. What they get for ā€œgoing homeā€ is how good they serve todayā€™s specials. For the record, I still donā€™t like those ā€˜dollar an hourā€™ wage dictates.

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  24. Tongueulence
    ReaderLady  almost 13 years ago

    Some years ago, I was at a cafeteria-style restaurant that also had a wait staff to serve drinks and such. I asked the waitress if they accepted tips. She replied, ā€œVery gratefully.ā€

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    Varnes  almost 13 years ago

    Yes, pay appropriately for the service. Just doinā€™ the job, 15%. (It brings them up to normal minimum wage)If they are helpful, sincere, do their job well and make you feel welcome with a smile, 20%. It they enhance the experience, are extra helpful, and make us laugh at least twice, 25%. But thatā€™s just me. The thing to remember, is the extra 5% is usually just a couple bucks to me. Itā€™s the rent, tuition, or kids shoes to themā€¦

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    Varnes  almost 13 years ago

    Letā€™s talk about morning waitressesā€¦..Donā€™t they come to the table and bring you specific things the same amount of times a night waiter does? Is bringing bacon and eggs, coffee and a glass of milk any different than bringing the surf and turf with a hundred dollar bottle of wine? No. They both work just as hardā€¦.guess who gets tipped lessā€¦ā€¦.I wonā€™t make recommendations on this issue, just think about it is all I askā€¦.Is that extra 1 or 2 dollars that precious to you?

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    6turtle9  almost 13 years ago

    Wow, so much ignorance here it is hard to know where to start; so I wonā€™t.

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  28. Sea chapel
    6turtle9  almost 13 years ago

    I think waiting tables should be a mandatory rite of passage, like military service is in some countries.If everyone waited tables for a year or two of their lives the world would be a much better place.If you have never waited tables, this may seem a silly idea;If you have, you know just what I mean.

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