My sweetie and I throw spears like this all the time, but we do it accompanied with smiles and hugs. BIG difference! If John had “joked” like that with my wife in THAT manner, I would have slapped the pink right off his face!
Ugh, I feel for Elly at the same time that I’m annoyed with her response. On one hand, I detest when a bully (male or female) tries to justify his actions with excuses, so I don’t blame her for her faces and response. It’s extremely frustrating to deal with people who dismiss your feelings. On the other hand, she needs to talk more and stop acting like a baby.
She should make him do all the housework during his vacation time. Maybe then he’d realize it isn’t a joke. If he makes a “joke” about it in the future, that’s more vacation time he has to spend doing the housework.
Some people think it’s funny to “tease” others. I think John meant what he said and when Elly called him on it he tries to cover by saying it’s a joke. The amazing thing is that most “teasers” do not like to be teased themselves.
Ever hear of housewives going on strike? I did for one week and by the time it was over my DH and children were so appreciative of all the work I did around the house. Never got one of those “John” statements again! ;-)
Teasing builds resistance to bullying and a thick skin. I’m not sure I would call it ‘character’. I have seen both fun and ill-intentioned teasing. John’s probably was ill-intentioned. In any event, once someone is hurt, the game needs to stop, and apologies need to be made.
Not too cool when the insult is on the other foot, is it John. @teddyr—Good for you! I too have friends I trade small insults with for fun. But we also know that it is not intended seriously, and we laugh together. If one or the other is not laughing, then it is no longer fun.
Gee, John . . . a joke or an insult. Hmmmmmmm. I wonder which one it could possibly be!!!!! Now go clean your glasses because you look like an idiot, sitting there, talking to yourself, with spit all over them!!!!!
Everyone does a bonehead move once in a while … the best couples race to say “I’m sorry” the fastest. Put your ego to the side and your relationship only gets better (yes, John is wrong here.) Reminds me of a joke (for you teasers who think Elly is thin-skinned) … if a man says something and no woman is around to hear it, is he still wrong?
kfccanada about 12 years ago
He’s starting to look peeved….good. He’s due for a come-uppance.
arye uygur about 12 years ago
Is that grounds for divorce?
pouncingtiger about 12 years ago
I know a lot of women who’d react like Elly. No sense of humor.
pendijk about 12 years ago
I agree 100%
brick10 about 12 years ago
John is too clueless to tell the difference between a joke and an insult….
teddyr about 12 years ago
My sweetie and I throw spears like this all the time, but we do it accompanied with smiles and hugs. BIG difference! If John had “joked” like that with my wife in THAT manner, I would have slapped the pink right off his face!
lightenup Premium Member about 12 years ago
Ugh, I feel for Elly at the same time that I’m annoyed with her response. On one hand, I detest when a bully (male or female) tries to justify his actions with excuses, so I don’t blame her for her faces and response. It’s extremely frustrating to deal with people who dismiss your feelings. On the other hand, she needs to talk more and stop acting like a baby.
ewalnut about 12 years ago
She should make him do all the housework during his vacation time. Maybe then he’d realize it isn’t a joke. If he makes a “joke” about it in the future, that’s more vacation time he has to spend doing the housework.
purplerider66 Premium Member about 12 years ago
Some people think it’s funny to “tease” others. I think John meant what he said and when Elly called him on it he tries to cover by saying it’s a joke. The amazing thing is that most “teasers” do not like to be teased themselves.
mrs.carlier Premium Member about 12 years ago
I think Elly’s response was perfect.
rlaba51 about 12 years ago
Ever hear of housewives going on strike? I did for one week and by the time it was over my DH and children were so appreciative of all the work I did around the house. Never got one of those “John” statements again! ;-)
pouncingtiger about 12 years ago
It’s called teasing. I guess Elly and maybe you never had siblings. Teasing builds character.
comicnut4636 about 12 years ago
THE ANSWER: YES!
jbarnes about 12 years ago
Teasing builds resistance to bullying and a thick skin. I’m not sure I would call it ‘character’. I have seen both fun and ill-intentioned teasing. John’s probably was ill-intentioned. In any event, once someone is hurt, the game needs to stop, and apologies need to be made.
amaryllis2 Premium Member about 12 years ago
@Night-Gaunt 49: I’d wondered how much of this reflected what led up to the author’s divorce; thank you for the note.
alcors3 about 12 years ago
Calling him Baraak is an insult
richardkel about 12 years ago
Not too cool when the insult is on the other foot, is it John. @teddyr—Good for you! I too have friends I trade small insults with for fun. But we also know that it is not intended seriously, and we laugh together. If one or the other is not laughing, then it is no longer fun.
richardkel about 12 years ago
Tough? Maybe. But hopefully it gave hims some food for thought.
way4me2b about 12 years ago
My ex had that kind of “sense of humor” & used it as another way to be mean to me. He was abusive.
Gretchen's Mom about 12 years ago
Gee, John . . . a joke or an insult. Hmmmmmmm. I wonder which one it could possibly be!!!!! Now go clean your glasses because you look like an idiot, sitting there, talking to yourself, with spit all over them!!!!!
rugratz2222 about 12 years ago
Everyone does a bonehead move once in a while … the best couples race to say “I’m sorry” the fastest. Put your ego to the side and your relationship only gets better (yes, John is wrong here.) Reminds me of a joke (for you teasers who think Elly is thin-skinned) … if a man says something and no woman is around to hear it, is he still wrong?