Frazz by Jef Mallett for January 24, 2014

Now that’s cold!

Colder than a pile of penguin poop?

Cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass monkey.

Don’t be the first to go on a cold morning.

Colder than a sow’s hind teat.

It was so cold yesterday I saw a chicken walking around with a capon.

Cold enough to freeze the nuts off a steel bridge….

As a Minnesotan living in exile in North Dakota, I can tell ya that yeah…that’s cold.

…in a brass bra…

Canadians put on sweaters . . .

Colder than a politician’s heart….

‘Brass’ seat?!“I’m an oak man, myself,” -Winston Wolf

Jef forgot Kelvin. :)

So cold, dogs were freezing to hydrants.

We tended to combine them:

“Colder than a witch’s tit in a brass bra doing pushups in a snow bank.”

My niece, an early morning talk show personality breezed into the studio commenting on the cold. “It’s cold enough to freeze the ball off a..(she was bleeped before she could finish)..pool table!” She was then given a “talking to” for what folks in her Bible Belt state “might have thought she was going to say.”

Cold as a mother-in-law’s smooch!

…and there’s Colder than a brass toilet seat on the shady side of an iceburg.