Frog Applause by Teresa Burritt for November 17, 2022

Just wing it.

Try the rule of thumb.

I’d be worried if I were that chicken. Where do you suppose that thermometer is going to end up? Not anywhere near his beak.

I’d do whatever the chicken says.  It’s the most realistic member of this tableau.

…how do you calibrate a meat< thermometer anyway?…

….egg-actly my thoughts, too…

…they used to last forever…

…take today’s comic out of the oven…

…it’s done…

…so which came 1st?…

…is this a Matrix gag?…

…I say, I say, boy…

…surprise, surprise, surprise, that’s not my meat thermometer, either…

It’s not the calibration, it’s the scale used. Meat thermometers are designed to be less accurate, to be more compact. The only concerns that they address are whether minimum internal temperatures have been achieved. For a live chicken, which as a pet might take objection to be objectified as an entrée, you should use an ordinary digital thermometer, oral or otherwise. I would recommend placing the thermometer sensor under the wing for about two or three minutes, unless you have a less casual, more intimate relationship with your chicken.

“He’s doing it right now. He’s got that phone out and he’s typing in some sort of personal narrative and withdrawing from reality”. Roger was a bit upset. Violet took it all in stride. “I notice that in your retelling of events, that you left out your trip across town. You rode the subway, I imagine?”

So the game was afoot. I put the phone away. I could finish later. “Yeah. I did. It didn’t seem important. Nothing unusual happened.” She took the bait. “You never know what might be important. Did you happen to be jostled on the platform?” Here we go. “There was a bit of a crowd, yes. That’s normal, though.” And here comes the Woo-Hoo nonsense. “Well, the new normal includes people being shoved off of the platform into oncoming trains. Now, you were not shoved off the platform, obviously, so far as we know. But somebody actually was, and at that same time.”

Which came first? The chicken or the Surveillance Pickle?

The Chicken is wise

Regarding the Blog: Teresa doesn’t have to drive us crazy. It’s such a short trip; we could walk.

Meat Thermometer.,. recalibrate with quality in mind. These days, toss and buy a new one…good to closest one-thousandths of degree.

And there she calmly sits, fully committed to the project.

Turkey Stuffing Recipe Here is a turkey recipe that also includes the use of popcorn as a stuffing — imagine that. When I found this recipe, I thought it was perfect for people like me, who just are not sure how to tell when poultry is thoroughly cooked, but not dried out. Give this a try.

8 – 15 lb. turkey

1 cup melted butter

1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good.)

1 cup uncooked popcorn (Fancy Farm is the best)

Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush turkey well with melted butter salt, and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan with the neck end toward the back of the oven. Listen for the popping sounds. When the turkey’s back end blows the oven door open and the bird flies across the room, it’s done.

F165

Choke the chicken until it’s done ….

Ovulation Watch could be a bonus w/a new thermometer.

I’ve never been more pleased to tell you to stick it up your…

Maybe you need a NIST Standard Chicken.

Chicken Day.

who listens to a chicken?

…put a dime on the needle…

What your chicken thinks, with his tiny birdbrain, probably cannot be trusted, ‘cause it fears you’re gonna shove that thing up his doofus and roast him!

That’s not to say you don’t need a new meat thermometer, though. (That’s my lame copout….)

Recycle. Thermometers don’t grow on trees, you know.