In the Bleachers by Ben Zaehringer for February 21, 2023

Wait a femto second!

Kick back and relax folks. This is gonna take some time.

He…could…go…all…the…way!!!! Oooooh!! He stopped to divide! That’s a 10 nanometer penalty from the spot of the foul!

He spores!!!

“Good evening, ladies and germs!”

The defensive phages have stopped him on the 10 and medical crews are removing him from the field.

This play really squelched him flat! He was ooozing all over the field…poor fella!

Can you watch this online with a protoplasmic streaming service?

For best viewing, see it on a Proto Plasma TV.

If this is a football game and they are amoeboid cells which move by using pseudopods (which means false feet), could this be called pseudopodball or a game of fake football?

On 4th and 1, they can use quantum tunneling to easily get a first down.

Football is in my genes…

I guess nobody told them that time ran out an hour ago.