Matt Bors for July 21, 2008

Transcript:

The Bush administration may be closing Guantanamo now that detainees have habeas corpus rights. What will become of the 260 remaining prisoners? George W. Bush: We've got to keep them beyond the reach of law! I've got a few ideas... GITMO 2: Gitmo in space. George W. Bush: Vacuum boarding - even better! Food prices are soaring. We could grind their bones to make our bread. TERROR WHEAT Organic fresh! Do laws apply in the sky? OF COURSE NOT. I may force them to live on Air Force One and be my butlers. Prisoner: My name is Jalal Hussein. George W. Bush: YOUR NAME IS ALFRED! Prisoner: My name is Alfred. Or, I may be NICE and send them home to be with their families, as bread. Woman: I remember him being...BIGGER. Cuter. Man: Sentient.