Pickles by Brian Crane for September 22, 2020

Guilt – the gift that keeps on giving

If her birthday was yesterday, then there’s no excuse not to remember.

Happy Schadenfreude To Yoooou…

I’m thinking they don’t have Facebook pages.

With me it was anniversaries!

Thou Art Doomed !!!

Earl, DON’T say another word. Quit while you’re ahead.

Earl you should of taken Opal out to eat ! A good meal is never late :-)

Now back away from the couch, Earl!

He just thinks she’s forever young – that’s Earl’s line, and he’s sticking to it!

OOOOOOOOOOOH! Opal, do you know how much you can milk this for? You go, girl!

An acquaintance once corrected me when I said “Happy birthday” to him. He said you only have one birth day, which is the day you born. After that, they are birth dates, the date on which you were born. Picky, but technically correct. So, Happy belated birth date, Opal!

It does not look to me that Earl feels that bad.

OY! Opal revels in his misery….and some how, one day, she’ll get her revenge….

“Your suffering is enough.”

Earl always forgets special events as Opal’s birthday.Happy first day of fall and with that my own husband’s birthday is today, I started yesterday wishing him early birthday. We are having birthday cake and ice cream wondering what food he like today. Just grateful we made past 39 years of marriage and today his birthday.

So do something for her now, Earl—something expensive. Haven’t you learned anything in umpteen years of marriage?

Just make sure you. remember… “this”… excuse can only be used once. A nice meal even a bit late can do wonders for a guilty conscience.

Wow! They’re so emotional their glasses fogged up.

Husbands should never ever forget their wife’s birthday, or their anniversary-45 years married. Don’t bother with the silly year means gift must have X, I just ask my wife what she wants, then get it for her

but just so you know – you bought me the new sewing machine that I’ve been wanting

Earl just say didn’t want to rub it in that she’s getting older.

Meanwhile, he knows what give next year. Something that she so relishes, the gift of guilt.

Opal, meet Betty. Betty, meet Opal.