Tank McNamara by Bill Hinds for October 14, 2024

See no evil, speak no evil, so who is hear no evil? (I’m guessing each team’s play by play announcers).

Be off or I shall taunt you a second time!

Maybe they should do a contest at half time at the Pro Bowl. Best big play celebrations.

Like the slam dunk or home run derby contests at all star games.

.

Separate contests for individual and groups of five.

And the contestants could wear glitter on their helmets and use Air Jordans or something instead of cleats.

I feel like this is a rule with a rather large gray area where, on different days with different officiating crews, you might get different calls. Maybe during the pre-season all players should secretly demonstrate the moves they plan to a select group and, if they get a go-ahead can show a video of it if they are hit with a penalty to show it’s kosher…

How do you penalize a referee?

How can a mime be your consultant?

Cartoonist’s block?

There will be some interesting decisions. The old “unsportsmanlike conduct” covers a lot of ground that this could miss

The 2A gives everyone the right to fire an invisible gun

The only good mime is a dead mime!

I remember the former times when a defensive player making a sack just walked back to his huddle. Or a player making a touchdown just dropped the ball and went to the sidelines. What’s the big deal with celebrating about doing your job?

Should I have a big celebration every time I get a new program I wrote to run? Of course not. It is what I am paid to do and I figure athletes are no different. No reason to get excited about doing what they are being paid millions to do.

Maybe defensive backs need to do a dance of shame when they get burned for a TD. Or maybe the whole O-line can do a dance of shame after a sack. That would be more appropriate.

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