That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for April 11, 2019

“Don’t get so upset — I may just be late this month.”

“It’s not true! My diary was hacked!”

“Don’t be so dramatic just because I beat you in the brackets.”

I already told you that ours is impossible, I’m gay and I’m in love with your brother.

Mary’s breasts had always been a dead giveaway at the “guess who” game…

Chad, you’re just being a big baby.

And get you hand off my…

“Oh Reginald, I’m sorry. I thought you knew you have severe halitosis. What with all the withering flowers in the garden, I thought it was obvious.”

“15-16-17” “Chad let go of my breast so I can go hide”

Chad was then informed that he needed to be standing before doing “The Dab.”

“It’s a draft notice – they’ve rejected my “heel-spurs” claim !"

“C’mon.. look.. Angus.. LOOK.. LOOK AT ME! ANGUS!! …. fine …. there are other boys in this town … I’m outa here.”

“Gee Fred,all I said was that my mother was coming to visit”

Come on baby, you’ve had worse horoscopes before.

Chad was inconsolable when he learned that The CW Network has cancelled “Riverdale.”

Coat jealousy at it’s worse.

“Ay, but to die, and go we know not where;To lie in cold obstruction and to rot;This sensible warm motion to becomeA kneaded clod; and the delighted spiritTo bathe in fiery floods, or to resideIn thrilling region of thick-ribbed ice;To be imprison’d in the viewless winds,And blown with restless violence round aboutThe pendent world; or to be worse than worstOf those that lawless and incertain thoughtImagine howling: ’tis too horrible!The weariest and most loathed worldly lifeThat age, ache, penury and imprisonmentCan lay on nature is a paradiseTo what we fear of death.”

Oh, Sis, you don’t have to go all the way. Just go down on him! He’ll be content with that!

" I’m so sorry, Percy, but I can’t lend you my organdy gown."

Crybaby!

“Don’t be so dramatic, Chad. I’m sure That is Priceless rejects LOTS of comments.”

Lauren newly convinced that Conversion Therapy is a load of hooey.

Don’t cry over your Dear John letter, am I not a woman?

“Well, we all told you that ‘Love Story’ has a sad ending.”

His facial expression changed from false lovelorn anguish as she slipped the stiletto between his ribs several times. She was serious about not stalking her. His death was recorded as suicide by several self-inflicted knife wounds in the back. They never figured out why there were no holes in the cloak.

I thought you knew they were falsies.

Measure for Measure: 

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/art/detail.php?ID=28445 

has info and links that point to info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting.

http://www.artcyclopedia.com/artists/calderon_philip_hermogenes.html 

https://www.the-athenaeum.org/people/detail.php?ID=1517 

http://www.avictorian.com/Calderon_Philip.html 

https://books.google.com/books?id=ta8WAQAAMAAJ&pg=PA21#v=onepage&q&f=false 

https://www.artrenewal.org/Artist/Index/550 

http://victorianweb.org/painting/calderon/index.html 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist, perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the first URL. So far, 2 works by him used here. 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2017/10/27?comments=visible 

has the prior work (my comment there had the last 2 artist info URLs).

Again, a larger strip image is shown by clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2178 (April 10, 2019) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

“Don’t be such a drama queen – I only said, ‘Not tonight’…!”

Hey, I said ‘spoiler alert’. I’m sorry but it’s true. All the dragons die.

“Pardon, my dear. I believe my deodorant has stopped working.”

but Agatha, I am so sorry to tell you this late, but I just now found out that I am gay and can’t get married.

Somehow I don’t think John is as inconsolable about the break up as he is pretending, given that he’s using the opportunity to cop one last feel.