Aunty Acid by Ged Backland for February 19, 2025

“And they mockingly call me ‘Carla Assless’!”

But your butt was replaced by the @ss you married, Aunty.

When I was young, I wanted to be crazy rich. I’m so happy to announce, that I have achieved the first half of my goal.

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it left

When I was young, we always paid the rent and had food on the table and that’s about as far as the amenities went. Everyone else I knew was in the same situation. This was normal and this was the standard by which I judged the world. So poor, no, but not too many missed paychecks away.

For my parents, who grew up during the Great Depression and survived World War II, this was nearly Utopia.

It was not until I was older that I came to realize that movies and TV were not all fantasies and that some people like the Cleavers (Leave it to Beaver) lived in their own houses.

And neither am I.

(O,O)

Same here, Aunty!

Judging by your rump size I’d say that you didn’t work nearly hard enough, Aunty!

Aunty Assid?

Aunty, when I was young, I was poor. After working my @$$ off and investing part of my earnings regularly without fail, I can say I am definitely no longer poor.

A Particularly Impressive Comeback Given The Circumstances

My phone number belongs to a state that is in a completely different time zone from where I currently live. I leave my phone on in case my mom calls about my stepfather as he’s in bad health.

It’s roughly 5:00 am when my phone rings. I instantly panic because I think it’s my mom. I answer, and there’s a woman screeching into the speaker.

Caller: “My chicken nuggets are f****** cold!“

My sleep-deprived brain can’t form a response.

This woman goes on to insult my lineage, my intelligence, and everything else she can because of cold chicken nuggets. I get the impression she thinks the number she called is for a McDonald’s — and I think I know which one she went to. They were notorious for being awful back when I lived in that state (and it was the management that made it awful). I’m glad to see some things didn’t change in seven-plus years.

Finally, Crazy Chicken Nugget Lady pauses to take a breath after asking me what I plan to do to make it up to her. I don’t feel like arguing with her. Based on her behavior, I’d get more attitude if I told her she called the wrong number.

So, I do the only thing my sleep-deprived brain can think of.

Me: “Ma’am, this is a Wendy’s.”

I’ve never heard someone hang up so fast, and I got another two hours of sleep before my kiddo woke up for the morning.

I’ve just seen the same joke recently. It may have been someone’s comment.

……..at lest you earned it!!!!!

Was young

Proof read much!

know the feeling

Being young and poor is natures way of accustoming you for marriage and children.

Welcome to the club.

That is true.