Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for March 06, 2020

Calvin rooting for the apex predators.

Calvin deserves a Pulitzer Prize.

I loved hearing my dad’s stories so much I would often come up with ridiculously specific premises for him to tell (usually stolen from other children’s books I read, though it was fun to see his take on them).

The crossover only Calvin could ask for.

I like it.

And you’re left with one big fat wolf.

I like this kid.

All that eating is giving me stomach cramps.

…and they all died happily ever after.

That’s Grimm, Calvin.

Happens all the time in the business world.

Actually, Calvin’s not all that far off from the original Grimms’ Fairy Tales. Those were pretty…grim.

Calvin needs to be fed more at dinnertime.

Grimm indeed.

My first thought was as some have already said, someone needs to feed that kid, he’s still hungry. A bowl of Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs ought to do it.

Sounds like Calvin just told the story! Now lights out!

Grimm’s Fairy Tales as visualized by Calvin!

Given the fact that the original fairy tales were much more gruesome than their modern versions, I’m surprised that this hasn’t actually happened.

Calvin has a definite ‘Game of Thrones’ leaning. Who knew, way back then.

a bomb dropped, everybody died, the end

Any room for a Death Star in there?

It’s the circle of life

In the original 3 Little Pigs the wolf eats the first two pigs and the wolf falls into boiling water in the third pigs house and dies. It is only in the Disney version that they escape to the brick house, even the wolf lives. The moral of the story was that being lazy has consequences.

DC Comics: Bruh, we could make it happen.

Calvin trying to design the original (expanded) Marvel Cinematic Universe.

There is a movie portraying Hansel and Gretel as grown-up witch hunters armed with rapid fire crossbows. I don’t recommend it.

Many fairy tales originally ended badly…before Disney.

Now there’s a story I can sink my teeth into…

the end….good night. sleep tight. don’t let the bed bugs bite.

Well that was easy.

Well, you’ve supplied the story, Calvin. Write it down.

I would recommend “Into the Woods” to Calvin, but he wouldn’t like musicals.

The bears never meet the three little pigs – why do they get to eat them? The bears should eat Goldilocks and the wolf eat the pigs and LRRH.

Man, that’s going to be one FAT wolf!

The bears will probably end up eating the big FAT wolf, in the end. Plenty of wolf to go around!

My German grandmother used to tell me those tales, which were closer to Calvin’s idea than today’s sanitized versions, eg. the wolf eats grandma and Red Riding Hood. And nursery rhymes were pretty gory too, like Ring Around the Rosie, supposedly about the plague.

Calvin grows up to become a rival of Stephen King…

Hell! I’D like to see that!!!

His dad should get him a copy of Roald Dahl’s Revolting Rhymes.

Wolf: Hey, bears! I wanted to eat those pigs!

Mama Bear: Well, sorry. We were here first!

Papa Bear: Hey, how about we make a deal? If you show us where that Goldilocks girl is, we’ll let you eat some of her, AND Little Red Riding Hood.

Wolf: Well sure, since I’m in Red’s story too! And maybe we can see about Hansel and Gretel…

This is really common behavior/interest for boys. My brother and I used to read comic books called “The Crypt of Terror” and “The Vault of Horror.” Both full of gore. Mom didn’t like it, but Dad said it was OK. Today, we enjoy the The Far Side cartoons. Death wasn’t such a big deal, but BIZARRE was really what we liked.

Still might be better than another round of “Hamster Huey”.

Sounds like the corporate world.

Calvin has the makings of being a good fanfic writer.

I’d love to hear the soundtrack to that movie.

I’d pay for a story like that…lol

Hey Calvin, write it yourself and illustrate it.

A fairy tale mash up before there were mash ups. Calvin started it all.

my bedtime story for my two grandsons was: ‘’once upon a time, blah blah blah, yada yada yada, they lived happily ever after, the end, go to bed" they’d roll with laughter and I had to tell it 4 or 5 times every night

Thank the GREAT Cosmic Muffin that this kid doesn’t survive his elementary years.

And for dessert – the witches house?

Calvin’s Fractured Fairy Tales.

I think Calvin changed his name when he grew up and then wrote “Game of Thrones”.

Calvin has…certain interests.