For Better or For Worse by Lynn Johnston for February 12, 2014

My daughters’ school does that. I’m glad, because I never got valentines in school, like Charlie Brown.

When my younger daughter was in 1st grade she had to write out all of her friends’ names on the valentines, plus her name: Elizabeth. She declared that, the next year, she was going to write her nickname: Buffy. Less work.

XD to every single comment up there.

Have you all seen where the Valentine boxes have become an ‘Art Form’. I wasn’t aware of it until my boss started to tell me about the projects and show me pictures.

When I was in third grade, a girl in my class marched up to me on the playground and told me “I have a Valentine for everyone in the class except you, because I don’t like you.” I had barely spoken to this girl before that moment and would not have been surprised not to receive one from her. Not sure what her motivation was for telling me I was “special”.

all elementary schools that I know of do a list of everyone in the class so no one is left out, but so many schools have done away with the parties like Valentines, takes up “valuable teaching time” ((gag)).

When I was a kid in the UK we never did this valentine thing. When I moved to Canada I found it amusing that in North America kids are forced to ‘like’ or even ‘love’ each other.

Our schools do valentines parties, and do provide a list of all the students. My kids are preschool, 1st & 3rd and this is EXACTLY what happens with the older 2.

Poor Michael i think valentines are more of a girl thing ??? 8^0

Is that good or bad?

Wait until you grow up Michael! You’ll wish all you had to do is give a card. :)

I remember doing this even when I was in elementary school, and that’s more years ago than I want to remember.

Elementary school valentines grate on my nerves. The kids seem to like it, but I detest “give an insincere sentiment” day.

Lynn’s notes:

I don’t think schools go for the “give everyone in the class a valentine” any more…and I think it’s for the best. Some kids in my elementary classes never got or gave valentines because their folks couldn’t afford the bags of pre-cut cards. We couldn’t either, but my folks always bought them because they wanted to spare us the humiliation of having nothing to give.

Sorry, Lynn, I disagree. Not having anything to give is a lot better than not getting anything (like Charlie Brown). An empty Valentine’s box is a humiliation way beyond not having them to give out.

I think that sometimes you misunderstand what Lynn says in her notes.

Just because her parents had a store doesn’t mean that they were rich. Long time ago people had accounts and might not have paid on time… There are many reasons why they might have been short at the end of the month.

Anyway, the part of Vancouver where she lived might be upper class now, but it wasn’t then. She even said in another note that her old neighbourhood today is completely different from her childhood days.

I know from my own childhood: I didn’t know how well off we were or if we lacked in anything until we moved to a different part of the city and I went to a different school.

Anyway, her point in the note is that her parents, at least, maybe because of their standing, made sure that she, at least, had a card for everyone in the class, so what’s wrong with that?

This is spot on to what the kids go through. I think it’s a good thing they use a list of all the students’ names; the idea being they model appropriate behaviors such as inclusion, sensitivity, etc., and they may later internalize these same behaviors. That’s one theory at least. Another reason to use a list is it’s just more fair and humane and cuts down on the hurt feelings. Sorry – went on too long there. Enjoyed the other comments.

I remember when my children were young, they did the cards as well, and they had a lot of fun doing them. Not so much the boy, but the girls liked making them and then signing them. Then when they came home they compared their haul, almost as proudly as at Halloween. I remember that sometimes, they would even get two or three cards from one person, and that was so very special for them. The school didn’t stress the complete class after grade 3. In older grades they all had class party like a pizza day (red food), or something like that. By the time they reached grade 7 and 8 they had a valentine’s day dance in the gym during the last hour. We had a very active parent’s committee and we were part of getting decorations for the gym, which the girls and boys put up during their lunch that day.

Never put names on the cards. Much faster to pass out without names.

It’s easy for Ellie to say that. Mike is the one filling out the cards!

I still think that you misunderstand Lynn’s notes. If one takes in the big picture of her life, she was not rich when she was her parents’ daughter, and she wasn’t rich when she went out on her own, and her success didn’t happen over night.

Right now, even, her life isn’t the happiest one, since she has a debilitating illness. Just because she can pick up and go and not count her pennies, what joy is it, when she doesn’t have her complete health.

I know people who know her, and she is the most generous and kindest person that you would ever want to meet.

When I went to grade school in the 60’s, they did not make you give everyone in class a card. I still remember to this day how much it hurt when I did not get any.