Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for August 24, 2014

Been there, done that. Still have the scars on my arms to prove it.

Cats and water don’t mix……therefore I had never been a cat person .

Cats and water don’t mix……therefore I had never been a cat person .

Beautiful, absolutely beautiful.Now, along with Wiley bears, we need more Wiley angryCats.

For a few frantic heartbeats there I was afraid Wiley’s world had wobbled wildly and one of his beautiful bears had snapped and run amok. Thank the gods it was only a cranky cat.

I once found a kitten abandoned in our yard (we had a thick wooded area). The thing was covered in fleas, so I had to give it a bath.It was like dipping a fuzzy orange chainsaw.All four legs were spinning in different directions, and each one covered in claws.We both survived.

For a moment there I thought we were back with Homer, chapter 2.

Somebody, I get it….Funny……But you’re not getting your hands on my kitties…

^This is a viable technique, or: Make a round tube of wire the little squares, make a plug for each end, put cat in, put tube in tub, and shake, rinse, let cat calm down before removing plug. Or, my son’s technique is welders gloves and guantlets.

It’s amazing that a little three-kilo cat can require 150-200 kilos of humans to try and make it do something it doesn’twant to do (bathing it, or getting a pill down it head the felinedon’t-wanna-do list), and even those odds are no guaranteeof success. It still can be more than your life is worth….Love ’em anyway!

You don’t bathe a cat. You brush a cat.For a moment, I thought I was looking at The Conjurers.Nice.

Gotta love that cat scratch fever! Lightly turns a young man’s fancy to he-man graphic novels.

“How To Bathe A Cat . . . "Best advice EVER ! Out-frickin-standing !

Had a cat that liked her flea bath and LOVED the blow dryer. She would raise her legs and roll over to help. Start this with a kitten and it will last their whole life.

I prefer the graphic novel version – or a good Youtube vid

did that, and lost the dog….meat all over thae place.

Great instructions Dog.I think it’s you in the first clip of this video

Perils of pets? At least it gives someone a chance to create a little farce.

those damn pop bang ads are a waste….

Bengal cats (not tigers) like water…they’re awesome cats.

Great strip!

But if you ever do have to bathe a cat, get an old window screen (or screening stapled to a frame) and put it in the sink.

Then put the cat on the screen and turn on the water. The cat will sink her claws into the screen, and you’ll be able to bathe and rinse her without trauma (to you.)

When you lift her out of the sink, the screen will still be attached, and you can usually dry her fairly well before she lets go. When she does, step back, and let her finish herself.

I had a manx cat that needed to be bathed frequently. Once someone told me this trick, there was no more “tribal scarring.”

I like cats. I call a bath “rain”.

There is no conceivable reason to ever bathe a cat. They keep themselves naturally clean, unlike dogs.

if you have a RagDoll or Ragamuffin breed, they are unlikely to make a fuss except to meow piteously….no physical violence….sorta like a fur covered pillow; you can even use a hair dryer after the bath.

Once volunteered to feed cats for friends going out of town for a few days. Was told as they were leaving that one cat was on medication – a shot and a pill. The shot wasn’t too bad, but even using the towel method, the pill was. The cats didn’t like each other, but the other cat attacked me as I tried to force the pill down its enemy’s throat. Go figure. Never volunteered to feed the darling critters again.

Why do cat owners think they need to bathe their pets in the first place? Far as I know, cats don’t bathe in the wild, so this would seem to be a human imposing his/her idea of “normal behavior” on the animal.

For that matter, cats in the wild NEVER eat vegetable matter (source: Mary Roach, “Gulp”). Why do nearly all of their owners insist on feeding them food that’s at least part vegetable (made to smell/taste like meat by clever food chemists), and some even go so far as to force “100% vegan” food upon a natural pure carnivore?

Humans are by far the strangest species on the planet…

Oh yes, been there!!!

Cats. Strange creatures. They like the water dripping from the faucet and the water in the tub. Just don’t put them in the tub filled with water. then there are those that do well……http://news.nationalpost.com/2013/06/20/pictures-and-videos-of-massive-flooding-in-canmore-and-southern-alberta/I remember the video. The cat used his tail like a rudder.

@Somebody Short

I have had as many as five cats at once, now only one. I offer this as my credentials as a cat person.

BUT, I laughed my head off at your how to bathe a cat instructions.

Get over yourself.

I don’t think I ever got injured while bathing a cat, but once one of my daughter’s cats started to toss a hairball on the kitchen floor. I scooped him up and held him over the kitchen garbage so he could throw up in there. This was not a swift idea, folks. The guy in the urgent care E. R. washed and washed the big flap on my wrist, and there’s absolutely no scar there now.

take it to the cat groomer

I am able to do that with one of my cats. I have been told by every groomer in the area not to bring the other one back.

Yeah alot of people talk about how cats really don’t like bathes and forget that dogs have the same reputation.

No they don’t, your just a troll.

BTW: my son’s silver Bengal does love the water, and baths. He’s a vet tech, and cats often do need baths, just like dogs, if they get into “bad stuff” around the house where licking themselves would kill them.

Also tigers (THOSE Bengals) like the water and are excellent swimmers, watched a couple crossing a river in ‘Nam once, they’re really need critters when seen in the wild!

Oh, that’s hilarious! Rates right up there with trying to make cookies with cats in the house! Or wrap presents. Thanks for the laugh!

The only thing that might work would be very thick leather glove that cover your arms to the elbows and maybe a goalie’s mask.

Nice artwork! Would love to see more of Jeffrey’s graphic novel tales….