Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 28, 2015

Australia has kangaroo beer!It’s the hops.

Today’s background music: “Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport” by Rolf Harris.

We have culture?

I’ve read when the first European explorers came to the land soon to be named Australia, they asked an indigenous person what the name of the jumping animal was. The response was what we now the animal as today as kangaroo though really meant in the indigenous language “I don’t understand what you’re saying.”

Has Stephan learned how to draw kangaroos yet? He may even get a chance to meet Skippy! (now retired and living in a care facility outside of Sydney.)

It’s them Drop Bears!! The bloody things ‘ill getcha if you’re not careful! They’ll tear your face off! Terrified of chain saws, however, so always carry one with ya.

Are you coming to sleepy Adelaide? If you are I’ll buy you beer or some seriously good red wine. BBQ perhaps? Lots of meat and very little veggies.

Shh! Don’t tell Stephan! Besides, we all know the real Skippy died of radiation poisoning after disarming that nuclear bomb at Lucas Heights. A true Aussie hero.

as soon as Stephan steps on the plane, some call NSA to show them these strips. By the time he wants to come back he will be on the Terror Watch List. No more Rat….just Kangaroo instead!

He should read, “In a Sunburned Country” by Bill Bryson – the best, certainly the funniest, travel guide on the Land Down Under.

He has a major problem with retention. Just look at the gut on him.

I have this problem: as soon as I close the book, most of it is gone. There are some books I’ve mistakenly reread and didn’t realize it until I was halfway through and the deja vu kicked in.

@TEMPLE S.U..D: That’s how people say the name “Yucatan” (where I am at the moment) came about.

We eat kangaroos.

Ooo! Time to get some books signed!

@SherlockWatson—

“Tie me Pastis down, sport Tie me Pastis down…”

Toon Boy has no problem retaining fluid though…………in his medulla oblongata.

He remembers the types of books he read, but all he can remember is “kangaroo.”

Just keep thinking Pastis. Something will jump out at you.

And NUMBATS!!!!!

OOOOOOOHHHHHHH -SHINY !!!!!

This bothers me more than it should but is Steph’s name pronounce like “Steve” or Stef"?

I have also problem with retention. I don’t remember the title and the author.

Never mind that Australia is home to more poisonous snakes than any other country. A herpetologist paradise. As for the Fosters, I suggest you look up the Monty Python “Live at The Hollywood Bowl” skit. Drinking American beer is like making love in a canoe….

They also have rabbits — which I don’t recall visiting PBS — probably because their ears are difficult to draw.

I hadn’t heard the news about Harris before I posted the above comment (Thank you so much, American TV news), so let’s replace the above song with “My Boomerang Won’t Come Back” by Charlie Drake.

Hope Steph survives the trip… after all, in Australia, Everything is Trying to Kill You

Writer’s Block!Uh… I mean Reader’s Block.xxx

One of the few places I will never go.

Stop shouting, Cartoon Boy! Everyone knows that lack of retention is the problem with overloaded speed-reading!

The world’s view of Australia in one comic strip.

And galahs. Millions of galahs. Most common bird in the New South Wales outback.

Thank the Lord for open book reading quizzes