Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for September 21, 2015

You gotta get back on the horse, Timmy.

Would’ve thought he was used to hard knocks.

It Keeps Right On A-Hurtin’… (Johnny Tillotson, 1962).

It’s been a long time, Timmy. Give it another try….

“You better let somebody love you…” before you become soup.

Well, some tortoise have lived for over 150 years so I guess 36 years is still a little too soon to hop back on that bike. Give it another four years Timmy.

OH! SEVENTY-nine. I almost had a traumatic flashback….

1879 that is (he is a tortoise!)

Rolling Stones “Time Is On My Side”

But he is useful at parties, as a table to set drinks down while people go to the head.

Have a son named Timmy. He never comes out of his shell either. Oh, he’s a hard one but I know he’s got his reasons…

Timmy won the race but the girl still went for the Hare!

Just send up my love ain’t seen nothing but tearsNow I’ve got myself in this room for yearsI don’t see no one, I never see anyone

I feel your pain, Timmy.

“I am a rock; I am an island…”

The seventies was a tough time to date. I couldnt pull anything in Kindergarten or nursery school. I had to wait til i hit grade school in the 80s to really thrive.

I told him he was making a mistake going for Reba Rabbit. Hare today; gone tomorrow.

If Timmy’s not ready to date a girl again, maybe he could try some alternatives, like this fellow did.

It’s her loss.

xxx

Of course, 36 years is only about 10 in turtle years . . .

Why has nobody asked how he got there without putting his legs out of his shell?

Makes a great place to sit, though!