Bloom County by Berkeley Breathed for November 02, 2024

I remember as a kid when our mom was always threatening to wash our mouths out with soap. I can’t recall it ever happening though.

Just don’t use Lifebuoy

It did happen to me… Once.

No more herring gut breath.

Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. My personal preference was for Lux, but I found Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner flavor – heady, but with just a touch of mellow smoothness. – Ralphie, A Christmas Story.

Let’s hear it for an unsung American heroine (heck, if you’re male you can’t even use the descriptor anymore without censure ): the Bimbo.

Grandma would shove the bar of soap in your mouth, then press your jaws shut so the soap would grind into your teeth

“Now, I had heard that word at least ten times a day from my old man. My father worked in profanity the way other artists might work in oils or clay; it was his true medium, a master. But I chickened out. And I blurted out the first name that came to mind…” “Schwartz!”

“A Christmas Story” — Ralphie’s fantasy of returning to his childhood home, as a blind adult, to tell his parents that he lost his sight due to soap poisoning.

Use tide pods… mouth will be clean, and WHOO HOO!!

How about a mom who tried to make me drink a gallon of water mixed with plenty of epsom salts when I faked illness to get out of school. Brutal.