The Born Loser by Art and Chip Sansom for February 16, 2021

Francis was a better scholar.

You’re never too old to go back to school.

Wrong question. You should have asked, “How many is a crowd?”

For her next trick Kewpie will solve an integral … what? I didn’t say she’s solve it correctly

Funny!

pointing at Mama Gargle “Kewpie, ATTACK!”

Whoever it was, they had hiccups.

Poor Mother Gargle!! She just doesn’t understand the “new math!!”

/SMIRK/

inflation!

Why do you even speak to her, let alone serve her such a good ball to spike…

This must be all of that “furry math” President Bush was talking about.

DiMaggio???

it’s the new math

Between songs, Steve Goodman randomly said “Roy Rogers to Trigger: ‘How much is two and two?’” then he stomped four times and said “one more boy”.

The old bat never misses an opportunity.

>Proffering a cup of hemlock< Salud, Mother G!

Never saw a better example of a loser!

Nobody said “woof” equalled “one”…

That last one was “Period!” ☺

Both need some work. She ain’t wrong today. Vicious maybe, but not wrong….

Has no one noticed Kewpie’s answer is three ?

Brutus, you shouldn’t have made it such a difficult problem. Next time keep it simple.

It occurs to me that even a balding man can be having a great hair day next to Mother Gargoyle. :))

Brutus: Mother Gargle, I taught Kewpie to talk.

Mother Gargle: I don’t believe you.

Brutus: Kewpie, what’s on top of a house?

Kewpie: Roof! Roof!

Brutus: How does sandpaper feel?

Kewpie: Rough! Rough!

Brutus: Who was the greatest baseball player ever?

Kewpie: Ruth! Ruth!

Mother Gargle leaves.

Kewpie: I told you it was Aaron.

One of the rules of any trick is to make sure you (and the dog) have it down perfectly before presenting it to a wider audience — especially when that audience is a sharp-tongued critic like Mother Gargle!