Close to Home by John McPherson for May 09, 2021

I can’t find Bleeb, how can that be. Sound the Horn Wa-oooo……Arrrrrooooooo!

(Ricola style) Goooo…to beeeeeed!

Unless she had a sore throat…Ricola!

He had to use his alpenhorn because he couldn’t find his didgeridoo.

Jason plays a Swiss Alphorn and for Swiss people is valid what Orson Welles said:

“Do you know what that fellow said? In Italy under the Borgias, for thirty years, they had assassinations, wars, terror and massacres, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love, five hundred years of peace and democracy, and what did they produce? The cuckoo clocks.”

She’s Polish, idiot! Soulda brought a Suka.

Riiiiiicolaaaaaa!

He did attract some large mammals, though.

Babinski. Are they in the Polish Alps?

Ricolaaaaaa

look in the window

Vuvuzela!

When he told her his plan, she heard “I’ll pine for you tonight”, and said “fine, go ahead”.

When serenading under your sweetheart´s window, be sure you have the right adress.

Bleeb is at the garage window, trying to get away from the noise!

I think this would be better than a didgeridoo. This sounds like a fog horn, a didgeridoo would make her think her house is haunted.

Cops will be here soon.

Play that funky music white boy.

ARUUUUU-GULA!

Oh wait, that’s a vegetable! Then what the heck was that cough drop commercial!

Ricola, that’s it… it was Ricola!

Now… what is that horn called…. Matterhorn? Nope, that’s a mountain.

Alp Horn! That’s it… it’s an Alp Horn!

Whew! I still have some memory! Thanks Red Bull…. I thought I was gonna have to go to the Google there for a minute.

Timing seems bad, but not a bad thought to try and impress her. At least it was novel….

He clearly didn’t understand what being really horny meant.

I played an alphorn once — very similar sound to a modern French horn. There are lots of YouTube videos of alphorn players and ensembles. Recommended listening. (Incidentally, the later Ricola commercials replaced the genuine sound with an electronic “tuba” sound. Irritating.)

I think he is full of hot air!

Anna Babinski would have enjoyed an accordion!

I can see why she wasn’t attracted to him, it’s obvious he’s a yodeler.

That’s because instead of wooing, he was wa-oooing

Whatever to throwing a pebble at a girl’s window to get her attention?

Is that regular-size, or just a little big horn?