That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for April 29, 2021

Both Mr. and Mrs. Collins were disappointed with her boob job.

I’m sorry, Don, I won’t go pole dancing anymore.

“No, that is not a gun in my pocket.”

Hey babe. You look pretty hot tonight. How about we ditch the party and go to my place.

“Best offer I’ve heard in decades.”

Hey, Mister, my eyes are here.

“Tell me again why I actually rented a tuxedo to attend an event that’s boring me to tears.”

I can see why he’s looking down, but why her?

L’Amour Manqué

Bertie to Gertie:♪♫"Mmm, would you like to take a walk?

Mmm, Do you think it’s gonna rain?

Mmm, how about a sarsaparilla?

Gee, the moon looks yellow

Something good will come from that!"♪♫

— Harry Warren, Mort Dixon, Billy Rose

Oh my! What IS she doing?

“You ready to leave?”

“But it’s my party.”

Thanks for the offer but I’m gay.

Stone Cold looks good when he dresses up in a suit.

“I said ‘My name is GAY Pene du Bois.’”

How the major imagined his meeting with Hyacinth would go. He was wrong.

My baby whispers in my ear, ummm sweet nothin’s….

She “shyly” accepts his advances/ (she knows her lush figure entrances)/ she is (more or less)/ a commercial success/ who knows well what the thing in his pants is…

Morning of the day their daughter marries Charlie Sheen.

“Excuse me, but I do believe I dropped my monocle down there.”

No Deloris, I don’t believe one is bigger than the other.

“You are to speak when spoken too…..GOT IT!”

Isn’t that Joe Stalin?

“Now remember, Bettina, as soon as I bump his drink, you lift his wallet!”

My dear, if I may say, you have a lovely de’collete’!

Hey, we’re in Europe. People just stand closer here, okay?

Why the F did you wear your pants with a button fly! You know I can’t undo those one-handed!

The Confidence Man: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Guy_P%C3%A8ne_du_Bois_-_The_Confidence_Man_-_Google_Art_Project.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting.

http://www.artcyclopedia.com/artists/pene_du_bois_guy.html 

https://www.christies.com/en/lot/lot-5846449 

https://www.askart.com/artist/Guy_Pene_Du_Bois/21773/Guy_Pene_Du_Bois.aspx 

https://www.nga.gov/collection/artist-info.1248.pdf 

all have info, or links that point to more info, about this artist, perhaps in addition to what’s pointed to by the title URL, which indirectly points to his French Wikipedia page 

https://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Guy_P%C3%A8ne_du_Bois 

(again, askart.com can be read in full for free on Fridays, and Google Chrome can automatically translate most webpages as necessary). First work by him used here.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image in Mr. Melcher’s MASTERPIECE #2696 (April 28, 2021) blog entry, accessible by the Check out the blog! box after the last comment.

It was no good. No matter how often she reminded him, he still always forgot to brush his teeth.

“Yes, it is nice out. But I don’t think you should leave it out.”

sorry, i dropped my wig down there and i’am going to get it back, one way or the other.you can’t hold it for ransom.

One way not to sport dandruff on head or shoulders.