Crabgrass by Tauhid Bondia for October 16, 2021

Bah. Don’t worry about it, Miles. Most wrestling promotions have done the whole “somebody stole the World Title” angle at least once or twice. You’ll be all right. Besides, Kevin, who put on the belt in the first place, will be the one who gets beat up…..

Mom always reassured me that if ever I landed in the Big House, I had a prison guard uncle who could get me enrolled in the college outreach program.

Please don’t let them spot the cuticle scissors.

Come on, you’re the smart guy – you open it up and set him free. Just remember to wipe off your fingerprints.

The belt is so small, it wouldn’t even fit on a wrestler’s wrist. Maybe this is just a fashion ring of some sort.

Kevin’s always looking for the silver lining lol

“The buckle! Look for the buckle!”

Unless you’re willing to go to community college.

This is what the mascot sensed. Rescue on the way!

Not to mention free room and board. So it’s all good

First thing I did when I went to prison is to try to sign up for college courses. Sadly, it wasn’t an option in Wisconsin. If you didn’t have a high school diploma, they had extensive resources (classes, tutoring, workbooks) to get you your GED, which was required if you wanted a prison job or trusteeship (trustee’s made regular wages working outside the prison, while prison jobs paid less than 50 cents/hour and were on prison grounds). I was offered a job tutoring which I turned down out of spite.

Turn him upside down and shake him.

Pretty sure those skinny little dudes could slip right through it if they tried.

Sheesh Kevin, if you can’t wrestle your way out of that, how do you expect to make it in the big leagues?