Herman by Jim Unger for January 12, 2022

A fool and his money are soon parted

I had an umbrella with a broken spoke and I waited a while before I replaced the umbrella.

Truth in advertising.

That way they can buy two for the price of one.

The perfect thing when it’s only raining half-day…

Half an umbrella for a half-wit.

With that kind of sales resistance it’s a wonder he has any money left

“I bought three of them.”

It’s true, 50% of the umbrella is off.

At least he got the handle side.

If if actually rains, he’ll need to switch it to his other hand.

LITERALLY

A prop used in Winnie the Pooh and the mildly breezy day

Makes you more manly as you cover your sweety.. your chivalry will be rewarded by her taking care of you when sick with pneumonia.

Why did Michael Jackson go to Penny’s?

He heard boy’s pants were half off

The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain, so, if you use this umbrella in Spain and it rains, be sure the good side is over the plain. Phew! I’m just trying to be helpful.

It’s a goods thing they weren’t 70% off!!!

You’re good, tomorrow there’s only a 50% chance of rain.

You need 2 to make a set.

Old joke. But I’m old, too, so I laughed!

You got a deal! It looks like you got 100% of the handle!