Why waste a good theme? Muslims may behead you if you diss them, but the Irish will often buy you a beer. I’ll go with the odds:
A secret agent parachutes into the Irish countryside near a small village to make contact with a spy in that village. All he knows about the spy is his name, O’Brien, and the code phrase “The crows fly at midnight.” After disposing of his parachute, he stealthily enters the town. Seeing an establishment called Murphy’s Pub, he decides his first stop should be orientation and refreshment, not necessarily in that order. So he goes in and orders a beer. As he sits down, a constable who happened to be in the pub says, “Hello, stranger. May I help you in any way?”
The agent figures, why not? So he says, “Yes, Constable. I’m looking for a man named O’Brien.”
“Well,” the constable starts, “There are several O’Brien in this town. See those two drunk twins at the bar? Their names are O’Brien. That beat-up man in the corner? He’s an O’Brien, as well. There’s a shopkeeper O’Brien, a farrier O’Brien…in fact, me own name is O’Brien!”
“It is?”
“Sure’n truth, it is.”
What do I have to lose? the agent thinks to himself. So he clears his throat, and says to the constable, “The crows fly at midnight.”
The lawman breaks into a knowing grin. “Oh, ‘tis O’Brien the spy you’d be wantin’!”
At Friday night services, Morris asks his friend Irving:. “I need a favor, I’m sleeping with the Rabbi’s wife. Can you hold him in synagogue for an hour after services for me?”
Irving is not very fond of the idea but being Morris’ life-long friend, he reluctantly agrees. After services, he strikes up a conversation with the Rabbi, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. After some time the wise Rabbi becomes suspicious and asks, “Irving what are you really up to?”
Irving, filled with feelings of guilt and remorse, confesses to the Rabbi, “I’m sorry, Rabbi. My friend is sleeping with your wife, right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied.”
The Rabbi smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Irving’s shoulder and says, “You better hurry home, Irving. My wife died two years ago.”
I asked to have part of my ashes spread in the wife’s garden. She thought it revolting. Each year she spreads manure in the garden. So now I know where I stand……
Instead of flushing those ashes, McDonald should have put them on the grass in the infield or outfield. Flushed ashes will simply end up in the sludge of the first downstream sewage treatment plant.
Article about Nadia: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/brian-red-hamilton-nadia-popovici-alert-fans-unique-warning-helps-nhl-team-staffer-nip-cancer-in-bud/
Photos and article about nature’s sand sculptures: https://www.livescience.com/science-behind-frozen-sand-sculptures
eromlig over 2 years ago
Why waste a good theme? Muslims may behead you if you diss them, but the Irish will often buy you a beer. I’ll go with the odds:
A secret agent parachutes into the Irish countryside near a small village to make contact with a spy in that village. All he knows about the spy is his name, O’Brien, and the code phrase “The crows fly at midnight.” After disposing of his parachute, he stealthily enters the town. Seeing an establishment called Murphy’s Pub, he decides his first stop should be orientation and refreshment, not necessarily in that order. So he goes in and orders a beer. As he sits down, a constable who happened to be in the pub says, “Hello, stranger. May I help you in any way?”
The agent figures, why not? So he says, “Yes, Constable. I’m looking for a man named O’Brien.”
“Well,” the constable starts, “There are several O’Brien in this town. See those two drunk twins at the bar? Their names are O’Brien. That beat-up man in the corner? He’s an O’Brien, as well. There’s a shopkeeper O’Brien, a farrier O’Brien…in fact, me own name is O’Brien!”
“It is?”
“Sure’n truth, it is.”
What do I have to lose? the agent thinks to himself. So he clears his throat, and says to the constable, “The crows fly at midnight.”
The lawman breaks into a knowing grin. “Oh, ‘tis O’Brien the spy you’d be wantin’!”
Templo S.U.D. over 2 years ago
wouldn’t cremation ashes clog a toilet even if it’s in small amounts?
Charlie Fogwhistle over 2 years ago
At Friday night services, Morris asks his friend Irving:. “I need a favor, I’m sleeping with the Rabbi’s wife. Can you hold him in synagogue for an hour after services for me?”
Irving is not very fond of the idea but being Morris’ life-long friend, he reluctantly agrees. After services, he strikes up a conversation with the Rabbi, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. After some time the wise Rabbi becomes suspicious and asks, “Irving what are you really up to?”
Irving, filled with feelings of guilt and remorse, confesses to the Rabbi, “I’m sorry, Rabbi. My friend is sleeping with your wife, right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied.”
The Rabbi smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Irving’s shoulder and says, “You better hurry home, Irving. My wife died two years ago.”
Until next time.
Zykoic over 2 years ago
I asked to have part of my ashes spread in the wife’s garden. She thought it revolting. Each year she spreads manure in the garden. So now I know where I stand……
therese_callahan2002 over 2 years ago
Maybe those sand sculptures will inspire those taking part in the sand sculpture contest at Revere Beach this summer.
derdave969 over 2 years ago
I’ve often suggested my wife carry my ashes in the trunk of the car in case she gets stuck in the snow.
Huckleberry Hiroshima over 2 years ago
Don’t you just love pranks done by nature?
Take care, may fossil denier Sarah “I Don’t Know What I Mean Either So You’re Not So Smart After All Are You” Palinord be with you, and gesundheit.
Charlie Fogwhistle over 2 years ago
Instead of flushing those ashes, McDonald should have put them on the grass in the infield or outfield. Flushed ashes will simply end up in the sludge of the first downstream sewage treatment plant.
dv1093 over 2 years ago
Forgotten American History: The Chicago massacre that took place in those sand dunes along Lake Michigan in 1812.
mindjob over 2 years ago
I didn’t know too much exposure to ice can cause skin cancer, until now
suelou over 2 years ago
A friend of my son’s once remarked, “Friends are easier to con than strangers”!..
ex window inspector over 2 years ago
I wonder how much money Tom spent going to all those ballparks
J. R. M. over 2 years ago
And Nadia got to meet the Canucks staff member on their following visit to Seattle Kraken. That story got widespread coverage in the Canadian media.
Nicole ♫ ⊱✿ ◕‿◕✿⊰♫ Premium Member over 2 years ago
Article about Nadia: https://www.cbsnews.com/news/brian-red-hamilton-nadia-popovici-alert-fans-unique-warning-helps-nhl-team-staffer-nip-cancer-in-bud/
Photos and article about nature’s sand sculptures: https://www.livescience.com/science-behind-frozen-sand-sculptures
oakie817 over 2 years ago
Nadia’s story was a cool one
Caeruleancentaur over 2 years ago
Somehow I don’t see being flushed down the toilet as a tribute.
globalenterprize1990 over 2 years ago
Awkward!!