The Born Loser by Art and Chip Sansom for February 18, 2022

She’s incapable of being pleasant

Brutus, why you married Gladys (and by proxy, her horrid, hateful mother) is beyond me.

Says the woman whose hair resembles a Brrillo pad – that’s gone rogue!!!

:-O

You have to consider wear and tear on the barber’s head polisher.

He’s only got one hair to cut. She’d love to cut it for you.

Finder’s fee.

Only for the nostrils and ears.

Not free, but a haircut where I live is $2.00. For that sort of money, O do not care what they do to my hair.

That looked suspiciously like a wisecrack to me.

That’s not wisecrack because the word wise and lady G. don’t suit.

Putting the hag in hag ridden.

“I ask, because my haircuts are free, but the stylist keeps the profits from selling the steel wool.”

i cut my own hair – the laughs are for free…

Poor Brutus – Sometimes you just need to keep your mouth shut.

Gargle’s hairdresser gets hazard pay for working with barbed wire.

You old battle ax have you looked in the mirror lately?

“And, dear mother, how much did you recover in damages when you sued YOUR hairdresser for malpractice?”

Now, that really is ridiculous. I still have hair about the roof and sides and I cut my own hair. No doubt the barber could do a cleaner job, and should I finally get married, I’d probably opt out for a barber cut. But, for now, I don’t see the need. Brutus, living with two negative females, might find the need to go somewhere that would provide him some positive conversation. My old barber visits were always looked forward to for the positive feedback one could expect.

Sad to say I have to agree with her in part. (Lord don’t strike me dead) For a 90% bald guy, a large discount would be appropriate by a barber. Definitely would make those customers very happy and the word would spread$$$$$……

“Well, he does show me the scissors.”

And his response, “And you pay for that?”.

With as little hair as Brutus has, he should just shave the rest of it off and be done with it.

Has Brutus ever considered just using the silent treatment when it comes to Mother Gargle. It would certainly cut down on the wisecracks.

As if Mama Gargoyle is an expert on hair grooming. Although it is a legitimate question.

Sure, Brutus! You don’t have very much hair. (He really does remind me of Homer Simpson in more ways than one!)

Considering her mop, she shouldn’t have to pay for that result either.