A Finnish salesman comes to Russia to sell chainsaws to local lumberjacks.
“With this saw a good lumberjack can cut down 40 trees an hour and not even get tired” says the salesman.
The lumberjacks, thinking that sounds pretty good, place an order for 50 chainsaws.
At first they are delighted but then the miracle wears off as they notice the Finnish salesman has greatly overestimated the saws’ efficiency as their best of the best could only cut down 25 trees per hour max.
They call and tell him there must be something wrong with the saws and ask him to come over to identify the issue.
The salesman is surprised but comes over.
One of the lumberjacks hands him a chainsaw to have a look at. He pulls the string and the forest is quickly filled with the roar of the engine.
The lumberjack with his eyes wide open exclaims “On Lenin’s tomb!!!These are motorized?”
Hey, all – and special shout to Joe and Charlie and Steve and all of you who only seek to put grins on faces! My schedule will be sketchier and sketchier as The Summer Of YesDear Travel (but I love it too) continues. However, as I mentioned, I have some reserve ammo, as with the following:
An old geezer becomes very bored in retirement and decides to open a medical clinic. He puts a sign up outside that read: “Dr. Geezer’s clinic. Get your treatment for $500. If not cured, get back $1,000.”
Doctor Young, positive this old geezer didn’t know beans about medicine thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000 so he went to Dr. Geezer’s clinic.
“Dr. Geezer, “Dr. Young began. “I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?”
The Geezer replied, “Nurse, please get 5 drops from the bottle from drawer 12 and put it in Dr. Young’s mouth.”
As soon as the substance hit his tongue, Dr. Young yelled, “Aaagh! — This is Gasoline!”
“Congratulations! You’ve got your taste back. That will be $500.”
Dr. Young, annoyed, goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money. “I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything,” he begins.
“Nurse, please bring the bottle from drawer 12 and put 5 drops in the patient’s mouth.”
Dr. Young: “Oh, no you don’t — that’s Gasoline!”
“Congratulations!” says the Geezer. You’ve got your memory back. That will be $500.”
Dr. Young is now $1000 in the hole. He leaves in a huff…but, unable to accept his twin losses, decides to come back one more time. This time, he changes his approach. “My eyesight has become weak — I can hardly see anything!”
“Well, I don’t have any medicine for that,” the Geezer admits. “Here’s $1000.”
Dr. Young takes the bill, but then looks at it and says, “Hey, wait a minute — this is only $10!”
“Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500.”
Since most of those islands are size of Hakaslottet or smaller it’s not surprising. And if you manage to find a picture, that’s a summer house you are seeing.
Although the “live” camera is presently not working, the site below shows many chicks running around the farm, alas no lines have been drawn on the ground:
Templo S.U.D. about 2 years ago
Is Sweden the only European country that fits that tidbit? What about any of the British Isles?
Charlie Fogwhistle about 2 years ago
A Finnish salesman comes to Russia to sell chainsaws to local lumberjacks.
“With this saw a good lumberjack can cut down 40 trees an hour and not even get tired” says the salesman.
The lumberjacks, thinking that sounds pretty good, place an order for 50 chainsaws.
At first they are delighted but then the miracle wears off as they notice the Finnish salesman has greatly overestimated the saws’ efficiency as their best of the best could only cut down 25 trees per hour max.
They call and tell him there must be something wrong with the saws and ask him to come over to identify the issue.
The salesman is surprised but comes over.
One of the lumberjacks hands him a chainsaw to have a look at. He pulls the string and the forest is quickly filled with the roar of the engine.
The lumberjack with his eyes wide open exclaims “On Lenin’s tomb!!!These are motorized?”
Until next time.
eromlig about 2 years ago
Hey, all – and special shout to Joe and Charlie and Steve and all of you who only seek to put grins on faces! My schedule will be sketchier and sketchier as The Summer Of YesDear Travel (but I love it too) continues. However, as I mentioned, I have some reserve ammo, as with the following:
An old geezer becomes very bored in retirement and decides to open a medical clinic. He puts a sign up outside that read: “Dr. Geezer’s clinic. Get your treatment for $500. If not cured, get back $1,000.”
Doctor Young, positive this old geezer didn’t know beans about medicine thought this would be a great opportunity to get $1,000 so he went to Dr. Geezer’s clinic.
“Dr. Geezer, “Dr. Young began. “I have lost all taste in my mouth. Can you please help me?”The Geezer replied, “Nurse, please get 5 drops from the bottle from drawer 12 and put it in Dr. Young’s mouth.”
As soon as the substance hit his tongue, Dr. Young yelled, “Aaagh! — This is Gasoline!”
“Congratulations! You’ve got your taste back. That will be $500.”
Dr. Young, annoyed, goes back after a couple of days figuring to recover his money. “I have lost my memory, I cannot remember anything,” he begins.
“Nurse, please bring the bottle from drawer 12 and put 5 drops in the patient’s mouth.”
Dr. Young: “Oh, no you don’t — that’s Gasoline!”
“Congratulations!” says the Geezer. You’ve got your memory back. That will be $500.”
Dr. Young is now $1000 in the hole. He leaves in a huff…but, unable to accept his twin losses, decides to come back one more time. This time, he changes his approach. “My eyesight has become weak — I can hardly see anything!”
“Well, I don’t have any medicine for that,” the Geezer admits. “Here’s $1000.”
Dr. Young takes the bill, but then looks at it and says, “Hey, wait a minute — this is only $10!”
“Congratulations! You got your vision back! That will be $500.”
whahoppened about 2 years ago
I’ve laid a hen on her back, calmed her down and had her stay there quite a long time.
therese_callahan2002 about 2 years ago
“Et tu, kitty?”
in-dubio-pro-rainbow about 2 years ago
I guess chicks will never pass the field sobriety test
Methinks it goes fast from the “Ides of March” to the idle mog’s mooch. Cats came, saw and now go bonkers…
Aha! And was there population on these islands before swedish meatballs were invented?
bunwarpgazoo Premium Member about 2 years ago
Since most of those islands are size of Hakaslottet or smaller it’s not surprising. And if you manage to find a picture, that’s a summer house you are seeing.
Dean about 2 years ago
Although the “live” camera is presently not working, the site below shows many chicks running around the farm, alas no lines have been drawn on the ground:
https://www.earthcam.com/usa/massachusetts/flyingskunkfarm/?cam=flyingskunk
BearsDown Premium Member about 2 years ago
Et tu, Mittens?
Huckleberry Hiroshima about 2 years ago
Little known fact is that Julius Ceasar coughed up a hair ball at that site that day.
Take care, may prolific chicken head-lopper Clem “Slow Hand” Kadiddlehoppord be with you, and gesundheit.
dv1093 about 2 years ago
Can I go to Sweden and claim an island?
hawgowar about 2 years ago
We used to hypnotize mamaw`s chickens all the time.
artegal about 2 years ago
Et tu, Whiskers?
heathcliff2 about 2 years ago
Speaking of islands, seems Indonesia doesn’t necessarily experience such transportation problems all alone.
petermerck about 2 years ago
Frozen chicken?
ellisc about 2 years ago
Quick, somebody draw a straight line on Biden’s podium!
Buckeye67 about 2 years ago
Apparently you Kyle Avlp of Sandford, FL to thank for today’s BION submissions. Way to go Kyle.
Stephen Gilberg about 2 years ago
I saw a Roman ruin with a lot of cats hanging around, but I didn’t think it was a sanctuary in any official capacity.
198.23.5.11 about 2 years ago
Oh,great.You’ve just tipped real estate vultures to go to Sweden and ruin Paradise.
And we come to bury litter boxes,not to praise them.