The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for January 28, 2023

That’s an easy scam. He’s obviously wearing a toupee.

Your part will depart…

Good, now he can join a men’s hair club!!!

If the hair’s not there, your head is bare.

…it will cause you to lose your mind.

He’ll save a ton on haircuts

At least he won’t lose his nose hair.

Hair today, gone tomorrow.

He’s not losing his hair; he’s gaining forehead.

Big talk for a blind lady.

He can do a nose hair comb over.

It’s inevitable, tell me something I don’t know!

And wear a yellow shirt with a jagged stripe on it.

Crystal Bald

I was an Eagle Scout. Now I’m a bald Eagle.

Don’t lose your hair or head over this/

I remember someone telling me that baldness was a sign of virility and I replied, “Lemme guess, you heard that from a bald guy.”

Too late you fake, that’s his pet cat on his head.

I dunno.. that dead animal look currently on his head suggests that he already has.

when he stiffs her on her fee she will curse him and there’ll be hell toupee.

How would Madame Zaza know? She’s lost her eyes, after all.

Only the blind can see…

Like Little Bunny Foo Foo, “Hare today and gone tomorrow”…..

And spend it back on head warmers.

and that’s the bald truth…

“… and one of your nose hairs will fall out.”

“And you will go broke soon, because you’re a fraud.”