Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for January 30, 2023

Gil: “A lift-a-thon…we drive people to wherever they need to go and we charge by the mile”. Dr. Pearl: “Isn’t that Uber?” Gil: “What?”

At least the good Doctor knows how to cover the school’s a$$.

25 cents a pound is peanuts.

So if an athlete picks up a hundred pounds one time, it costs a sponsor 25 bucks. Seems ridiculous. Even at my age I could raise a bundle.

Gil and Dr. Pearl hitting those vape sticks pretty hard in P2.

Half asleep still, I thought Gil had stuck his tongue to the flagpole. Would have been more interesting than a lift-a-thon.

P1 Cami eagerly takes credit for the idea, finally justifying her coaches salary in some small way.

P2 “We’re hosting a vape-a-thon, we’ll sell cartridges to the contestants, pretty tasty, eh Dr. Pearl?”

P3 Let’s get this straight. A kid will be expelled for brining a plastic kitchen butterknife to school to spread cream cheese on his bagel, but Dr. Pearl can wear those punji sticks in her hair without consequence? Is this country great or what? Salute!

As Gil and Dr. Pearl spark up by the flagpole, their idea has motivated the bats to flee the belfry.

P1: Kip Drordy guest stars in an unintentional South Park crossover.

I pity the fool who picks To Be as their athlete in the Lift-a-thon.

just ask for the money or show a video of your wife taking a shower at the scottsdale clubhouse your ideas are stupid gil

Is it going to be a safe event with Leo Atazhoon-tite sneezing all over the equipment?

This is probably the most ridiculous idea ever. Do the car wash instead. You know the cheerleaders out there spraying the cars and each other getting all wet and soapy…… Uh… hang on got to answer the phone.

While the kids are lifting for funds, the evil Vape pushers (being all addicted, you know) will lift the money from the “Fund Box” (yes, I spelled it correctly).

P4: ( Tobe shows up in his sunglasses)…”… that’s stupid af coach… let me show you two goofy old geezers how to really make some coin…’a lift-a-thon’… gimme a break…what’s next? An amaaaazing sloppy Joe Cook off?…”

No stars and only 6 stripes. What country are we in?

Wouldn’t that have made more sense during the football season. 50 guys vs, 12. Why have to go outside and stare at geese to pitch this idea??

How about the readers donating a dollar for every 4 days of strips of the 3-some at Talking Stick…

From today’s Comics Curmudgeon:

“Look at the beautiful flag flying in the breeze, Dr. Pearl. I tell you what, there’s nothing more American that forcing students to engage in feats of physical strength for the amusement of others in order to fund extra-curricular activities that could’ve been paid for by the district’s budget if the town hadn’t voted down the last four school bond issues.”

The volleyball team should be able to lift 20 pounds each or so, which would be good for a cool $5 bucks each. So for five sponsors, they may be able to buy a basketball…on sale.

Are they both smoking or is it just cold?

Whatever they’re smoking, I’ll take some if it will make me believe this crap.

Today’s mystery: Why do people, engaged in the time honored signaling for good-bye, desire autographs from Milford HS parents? and how much does Dr. Pearl think Gil can charge for them?

P1: “I came up with the idea.”

P2: “This is the stupidest fundraising plan I’ve ever heard of.”

P3: “Actually Kaz passed it on to me when he left and I’m just relaying it.”

And speaking of relaying ideas, I’m relaying the idea of reading today’s Mopped Up Thorp. And in case you missed it, scroll down to the previous post from Sunday, the premier of Milford After Dark!

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/