Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for April 15, 2023

“I certainly didn’t pump a 12 year old full of growth hormones and steroids if that’s what you or any nosey lawyers trying to indict me are implying YOU HEAR ME DEREK. I KNOW YOU LISTEN TO THIS PODCAST! I’M COMING FOR YOU DEREK! I’M A COMIN!

Cuz he was too busy vaping while banging the rival coach’s daughter who was mourning the imminent demise of Meemaw who was upset about Mimi’s threesome…

Even for Marty it’s an inane question. The coach’s son is under some obligation to play every sport?

P2 – The WD-40 guy is there to grease the ball.

Never seen a baseball team with all-yellow uniforms. Not even the A’s or Padres.

Moonman looks about 30 years younger since he stopped drinking. Meanwhile, Gilpa looks 30 years younger as he continues to slam Old Fashions with his favorite bartendress, Beth.

Pitcher named Pedro Martinez? Kidding right? Now batting for Milford — Frank Thomas.

BHHL: 90MPH! With a little work, we can get him close the 100mph fastball I had in high school. You know I pitched every game, (complete games of course) on my way to the state championship.

BHHL may be a huge ahole, but I’ll bet even he wouldn’t pull a stupid stunt like Gil and have crap carved into the outfield grass on their field. And speaking of crap, today’s Mopped Up Thorp is online.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/

Guaranteed I would spit coffee Mop if Valley Tech’s mascot was a Bull and Pedro nailed it like Nuke LaLoosh. Job well done. Take tomorrow off.

Wait, is BHHL saying that his wife is not Pedro’s mom? If Pedro was “bred” to be a Hall of Famer, does that mean BHHL knocked up someone like Jennie Finch?

Pedro better hope he’s not standing on a mound of fire ants. Those things are pure evil.

He wasn’t bred for basketball!!! Doofus.

If he was bred, was Keri butta?

Why would he assume a kid plays multiple sports? He a baseball player, Moon! Basketball is a totally different set of skills. Do you ask why the golfers don’t play tennis?

No way a high school pitcher is throwing a 90 mph fastball.

Luke clocks Moon’s mouth at 90 wpm!

P1- No name, no number, no logo. Nice uniform.

P2- The entire team could fit in those batter’s boxes.

P3- He’s going to blow out his arm but Frannie does Tommy John surgery on the side.

It’s about time someone said that to Moon, besides that kid who threatened to kick his a$$ about 20 years ago

Moon: “Keri told me he was fast, but I had no idea!”

P3: The illegal substance drips off the ball.

P2: Huh, I can’t see far away with this thing…I got gypped!

Episode 12 of Milford After Dark is online.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/