Cornered by Mike Baldwin for December 15, 2023

Definitely not from the “plant” based column.

I’ll just have the salad, thanks.

It depends. What’s the vintage of the foam tray?

Raw, raw, raw, that’s the spirit.

Not much of a tip coming for this one, since she’s paying. Oh, my, the waiter just assumed… Time to treat her like she’s a steak lover, and make sure she loves every…last…bite!

Hey! I wanted shoe leather. Why wasn’t that an option?

How raremantic!

On the hoof!

Wrapped in plastic on a foam tray, I guess!

Any more rare, it could have walked in here on its own!

I’ll have it with a sprig of parsley on the side.

Cripple it, and trot it past the fire

No thanks just put in a paper bag, please.

And could you have the chef slit open the wrapper.

well-wrapped…

I got served a pile of raw ground beef at a restaurant in the Pyrenees. Can’t remember what I’d actually ordered, but clearly my French wasn’t good enough to interpret the menu.

Is the foam tray local?

No, cremate it.

“At another restaurant. Let’s go.”

Frank, how does he know I’ll take half of it home?

this having been rated a michelin 3 star restaurant, I’ll take the foam tray please…

A joke well done.

I takes it in doggie bag, please.

Would you like something before dinner, or just the beef for dinner?

Red meat cooked passed medium rare might as well be shoe leather

There is always burned to a crisp.

They had that peasant look…

My father believed the beef should be hit over the head, and eaten while warm.

Id be foaming at the mouth for any of those!

My mother would put the blood from a steak onto a baked potato. (it made my siblings & I cringe as kids & STILL makes us cringe .)

my parents and older brothers used to eat “cannibal sandwiches”, raw hamburger with raw onion slices on buttered bread.