Speed Bump by Dave Coverly for April 27, 2024

The cone of Irritation

Hey! You can’t park there!

Road work ahead (starting next month but blocked off now).

VLC Media player?

It’s always the BEST SPOTS.

And your brother who invented the speed bump was banished from the village!

I wrote a letter to my elected official, “Dear Governor, New Jersey called. They want their barriers back.”

He also invented Speed Bump!

could be a driving test!

It’s a course for dogs to navigate.

I remember a driving instructor talking about maneuverability around parking cones, but they weren’t allowed to teach parallel parking…Go figure.

’Tis the season.

I’ve heard them called “Orange Highway Blossoms” because of how they pop up every Spring.

Orange rocks?

LOL!!

All I can think of is the scene from “Blazing Saddles” where Mongo parks his Brahma bull outside the saloon.“You can’t park that animal there!!”And Mongo proceeds to punch out a horse….

But they make good hats for The Coneheads.

That’s George Pylon, the famous inventor!

and thus it begins

The Illinois Department of Transportation bought the naming rights to our local Class A Midwest League baseball team.

For one day they were the Peoria Orange Barrels.

Whenever he yells “What are those?”, I scream “Cones!!”

He stuck his nose where it shouldn’t have gone (grindstone).

We’re from France…

His new products include orange striped barrels with flashing lights.

Better that kind of cone than “the cone of silence” (old Get Smart TV show reference).

And up ahead is a flashing arrow sign and a zipper lane.

Lost in the cone zone!

Orange Megaphones! I like to pick them up and shout: You there, come out with your hands up and you will not be harmed.

Now he has to invent a “road”.

Wicker or some other plant fiber, tar, and ochre for color.

Remember, moss always grows on the north side of a workman’s shovel. – Rodney in an old Wizard of ID cartoon.

Just another Cone Head!