The Argyle Sweater by Scott Hilburn for February 07, 2025

Wasn’t there a General Malaise in one of the Peter Sellers movies?

Just wait, Major Surgery is up next.

Is he from overseas? He’s stronger than a local Anesthesia.

They must have “Private” quarters!

Just wait until Corporal Punishment takes the stage.

… speaking to the numb skulls

Which one is Private Parts?

I’m reminded of Hodges manhandling Capt Mainwaring’s platoon in ‘Dads Army’.Mainwaring looks at him and says, “I will thank you to keep your hands off my Privates!”

General Nuisance will show up before long too.

The General wasn’t at all peppy.

and they see General Apathy every morning.

AKA Cadet Bonespurs.

At least you can relax. The reports from Major Concern are alarming.

But they never see Colonel Sanders. He’s too chicken.

Beetle Bailey would loves to duty under him.

The Squadron Commander was named Major Major Major (Catch 22)

But it is essential you get him before Major Pain.

And the 4 star in charge of Army Accounting and Finance is General Ledger.

Pep talks from General Electric on the other hand…

He makes them feel “At Ease!”

They were supposed to get a pep talk from a Chinese general, but General Tso’s chicken.

I see the troops falling out from that speech.

“Did you see the captain? He’s a marvel!”

Is that General Halftrack?

They wanted to hear Private Matters.

Note, no officers attending, the benefit of college education lengthy lectures.

wanna know what’s really funny?… I actually yawned while reading this! (ah, the power of suggestion!)

I knew a Master Sargeant Major and a Drill Sargeant Cannon in the Army.

Even worse is conducting drills for General Hysteria.

You don’t need General Anesthesia before Major Payne. He know a trick to take your mind off that pain.

Lunch will be served by Colonel Sanders.

back when i was in the Navy, my buddy Kolsch would actually fall asleep at attention

Major Bore is almost as bad.

It’s General Protection’s Fault

Yawn….

Good one, Scott! Thanks for the chuckles.