Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for April 05, 2012

You are so deprived, so much you’ve missed…

The household TV seems to defy the lsaw of gravity. And if Calvin is so adept at figuring out how many hours of his life he’s watched TV, how come he can’t answer his teacher’s simple arithmetic problems?

When it’s ignorant not to be ignorant, then knowledge is bliss, ey?

The whole universe was in a hot, dense state.Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started — Wait!The earth began to cool,the autotrophs began to drool.Neanderthals invented tools.We built a wall, we built the Pyramids!Math, science, historyunraveling the mysterythat all started with the Big Bang.

No doubt being able to recite the theme to Gilligan’s Island will pay off handsomely in the future.

LOL!!! That was my first thought, too!!!!

Captain Planet, he’s our heroGonna bring pollution down to zero!

I never even watched that. But it was on right before Thundercats.

All together now. . . . . “Say kids, what time is it”? “It’s Howdy Doody Time”!

Now listen to a story about a man named Jed

“Flintstones, meet the Flintstones. They’re the modern stoneage family.”

“Through early morning fog I see, visions of the things to be. The pain that is withheld from me. I realize that I can seethat suicide is painless. It brings on many changes, and I can take or leave it if I please.”

“The greatest clown in town is Huckleberry Hound.”

And who can forget the great lyrics from the Andy of Mayberry theme?

We got a right to pick a little fight — Bonanza! If anyone fights any one of usHe’s gotta fight with me!

The payoff comes when you start singing a theme song in a bar. Other people join in. Drinks are bought for the house. Fun and merriment abound…

"Making your way in the world today takes everything you’ve got. Taking a break from all your worries, sure would help a lot.

Wouldn’t you like to get away?

Sometimes you want to go

Where everybody knows your name, and they’re always glad you came. You wanna be where you can see, our troubles are all the same You wanna be where everybody knows Your name.

You wanna go where people know, people are all the same, You wanna go where everybody knows your name." – Cheers

Go, go, in the opposite direction…and there you will find yonder bookshelf.

‘Here we come..walkin’ down the street.We get the funniest looks from…everyone we meet! Hey Hey we’re the…uh…I forgot the rest…

See the U S A in your Chevrolet.Your dealer is asking you to call …

The Big Bang exploded …to smithereens!

The lyrics to “Amazing Grace” fit perfectly to the theme from “Gilligan’s Island.” Try it and see.

Mr. Wizard sometimes had “cultural references”, didn’t he?

Will Calvin be hogging the remote control now?

Does he KNOW how to work a remote control?

LOL xxx

Calvin without working too hard you should be able to catch up to the national average .

As hard as it is to believe, many people have gotten along quite well without TV. I grew up with way too much TV, but my kids, thankfully, have not. I think they’re much better off.

What rolls down stairsalone or in pairs,and over your neighbor’s dog?What’s great for a snack,And fits on your back?It’s log, log, log

It’s log, it’s log,It’s big, it’s heavy, it’s wood.It’s log, it’s log, it’s better than bad, it’s good."

Everyone wants a logYou’re gonna love it, logCome on and get your logEveryone needs a loglog log log

LOG FROM BLAMMO

calvin has great parents!

And Hobbes is running after him… why? (Maybe it’s to shovel him off the floor once he oozes onto it.)

Ha! 5000 hours. Rookies.

masterskrain, I’m sorry to say I can sing the whole theme song from Mr. Ed and Hansternator, The Beverly Hillbillies, too. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?!

Read Zits today for a correlation.

I knew it was something about fishing, but couldn’t recall the exact lyrics.

Go Go Power Rangers!Go Go Power Rangers!Go Go Power Rangers! Mighty Morphin Power Rangers!Close to 20 years, it still hasn’t left.

♬ I’ll be there for you…when the rain’s about to fall…♬

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!Heroes in a half shell! Turtle Power!

Television = bubblegum for the mind….chomp, chomp, chomp…..

Those from the Pittsburgh area, can you recall this: “Up goes the magic sword! Down goes the curtain! And back up again for The Three Stooges!”

“Come on, and grab your pole, and we’ll head to the fishin’ hole…”

The best “Andy’s” were from 1960 to 1965, when they were in black and white and Andy had his loyal deputy, Barney Fife, by his side! That show never was the same — or as good — when Barney left and they started broadcasting them in color.

Aw, Calvin—you poor thing. Better get crackin’!

Good one.

I guess there’s no need to say Calvin & Hobbes was pure genius. I love how the TV is always jumping up and down on the table!

“Space… the final frontier…”You know the rest… the show that boldly split infinitives where no man had split them before… ;)

Altogether now," na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na, BATMAN!!!"

I will be glad to loan Calvin my VHS copy of the movie. Assuming he has a VHS player.