Doonesbury by Garry Trudeau for September 27, 2024

So, that’s where Kamala got the idea of bussing people in from!

How much are you paying them, Mark? Certainly less than Trump promised his “roadies” to attend his rallies! Or a couple of nuts to try to shoot him!

You’ve been at the Orange Kool-Aid again. You know it causes brain damage.

All a sign of society losing all standards and going to the dogs. Back in the day, there were professional mourners available to provide top notch keening services.

When my mother died, my father was very depressed. He also was afraid no one would show up at the funeral. Many people showed up and that helped make him feel better.

So no open bar at the wake? Maybe he should have opened with that.

High school kids are cheap and all you need to serve at the post-funeral gathering is Skittles and Mountain Dew.

When I was a kid, my buddy and I used to run over to the neighborhood church whenever we heard the church bells toll on a weekday- we knew that the bells meant they’d be carrying out the casket in a couple of minutes. I don’t know why we considered that such a big treat, but if someone paid us in cookies, we probably would have sat through the funeral as well.

I’m surprised none of his former colleagues wanted to attend – you’d think they’d want to make sure he’s actually dead!

Paid mourners. Very old-school. Probably not paying them enough for the full “wailing and overacted grief” package though.

Professional mourners are a thing in some countries.

John Candy will make his famous speech about leaving the kid alone all day at the funeral parlor

Unreliable. Go down to the senior center to hire the truly mournful.

That’ll work, get through it, move forward, next story please ! ;-)

Hire an old woman dressed in black with a veil covering her face to stand in the back row and make everything more intriguing

If Mark is Jewish (“Slackmeyer”? quite possible), then 10 people, or 10 male people (depending on how traditional he wants to be) past bar-mitzvah are required, to be able to do the entire (10-minute) funeral rite.

Hmm…vs. guys in the Home Depot parking lot.

Straight out of that lovely boardroom scene in “You Can’t Take It With You”.

Paid mourners are not unknown. The more, the higher the status.

Paid high-school mourners. Lordy, lordy! What is the expressions I’m looking for…Oh, I know: What could go wrong? sigh.

They’re all going to play hooky in honor of his father.

Capitalism to the rescue….Slackmeyer the Elder would be happy.