FoxTrot Classics by Bill Amend for May 07, 2024

It should say “FOR flakes”.

Sugar Sugar Sugar Sugar and four flakes.

They’re Grr-reat!

Now with chocolate covered coffee beans.

Darn it, now you’ve gone and made me hungry.

And then they’ll still bury the cereal under a mound of more sugar, like I used to. As a kid I was skinny and my body would burn it up….not any more.

There is one thing I noticed about cereal commercials for kids, They show a table with eggs, toast, orange juice and a small bowl of the sugar-coated, chocolate bombs and say “part of this complete breakfast.” Does the kid see the eggs, toast and juice?

If there were truth in advertising, the voiceover should say, “An useless part of this complete breakfast.”

At least it’s not a bowl of Lucky Frosted Cocoa Trix…(thanks, Nostalgia Critic). Don’t try it, folks; I’m dead serious.

At my age, I can’t even sugary cereals like that anymore. Those days of getting away with that are long gone. Now, I’m suffering the consequences to indulging in my fill.

Did you know American cereals are banned in Europe?

Sounds like that should be used to make rocket fuel.

Was the jingle for this cereal sung by The Archies?

How dated. By my childhood in the ’80s, all cereals in the U.S. had removed “Sugar” from their names.

Years ago I decided to try a new, healthy-sounding cereal but I forgot to read the nutrition info. The first taste was sickeningly sweet. Turns out the first ingredient on the list was “evaporated cane juice crystals”, AKA sugar. Yuck! And it was apparently marketed to adults, not children.

I remember on ‘The Simpsons’ once a box of Krusty’s cereal had this on it: ‘Only sugar has more sugar’.

There’s no cereal left in the box. RJ from “Over the Hedge” has already snarfed the whole thing.