There was a guy who had one leg shorter than the other, and he had a friend who stuttered. One day the stutterer suggested “w-w-why d-d-don’t you w-w-walk w-w-with one f-f-foot in the g-g-gutter s-s-so it evens out?”
He decided to try it, and it wasn’t long before he was hit by a car. As he lay in the hospital, the friend came to visit and said “I’m r-r-really s-s-sorry you g-g-got hurt f-f-following m-m-my advice.”
The guy with the mismatched legs said “don’t worry about it. You meant well, and you were only trying to help. In fact, I’ve got a suggestion that might help you with your own problem.” “W-w-what is it?” said the stutterer, leaning in close.
A guy went to get a suit made. The tailor made one arm and one leg too long. The customer commented on it, the tailor replied, “No problem, just bend your arm to take up the slack, and when you walk, extend the leg to take up the slack.” As the man is leaving the store, arm bent and leg extended, a customer comes in and remarks to the tailor, “Oh, look at that poor man”. The tailor says, “Yeah, but what a great looking suit!”.
Everybody (almost) has an asymetrical head. And face. One of the things we humans find attractive is such symmetry, which is why there aren’t more beautiful (looking) people.
My left ear is a tad higher than the other, and, alas, my left eye is a tad lower than the other. So my glasses always look double-crooked.
Templo S.U.D. over 5 years ago
oh, you’re really helpful, Earl (go tot the optometrist, Opal, for a second opinion)
geneking7320 over 5 years ago
I think my right ear is higher that my left too.
enigmamz over 5 years ago
Most people have crooked heads. We don’t talk about because it’s so common.
leopoldenoch over 5 years ago
Lobotomy might help to balance the head
Breadboard over 5 years ago
Must be the reason why I never get my sideburns straight ;-)
jpayne4040 over 5 years ago
I thought Earl was getting himself in serious trouble in the second panel. I was relieved he cleaned it up in the third panel.
dadoctah over 5 years ago
There was a guy who had one leg shorter than the other, and he had a friend who stuttered. One day the stutterer suggested “w-w-why d-d-don’t you w-w-walk w-w-with one f-f-foot in the g-g-gutter s-s-so it evens out?”
He decided to try it, and it wasn’t long before he was hit by a car. As he lay in the hospital, the friend came to visit and said “I’m r-r-really s-s-sorry you g-g-got hurt f-f-following m-m-my advice.”
The guy with the mismatched legs said “don’t worry about it. You meant well, and you were only trying to help. In fact, I’ve got a suggestion that might help you with your own problem.” “W-w-what is it?” said the stutterer, leaning in close.
“Keep your danged mouth shut!”
iggyman over 5 years ago
After which Opal did some “adjusting” to Earls head!
Jeff0811 over 5 years ago
A guy went to get a suit made. The tailor made one arm and one leg too long. The customer commented on it, the tailor replied, “No problem, just bend your arm to take up the slack, and when you walk, extend the leg to take up the slack.” As the man is leaving the store, arm bent and leg extended, a customer comes in and remarks to the tailor, “Oh, look at that poor man”. The tailor says, “Yeah, but what a great looking suit!”.
Zebrastripes over 5 years ago
And if you believe that I’ll sell you a pair of heavy earrings….
jagedlo over 5 years ago
“crooked eyeglasses” quick-fix…https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsivqpWwI3A
morningglory73 Premium Member over 5 years ago
Earl is a bundle of laughs. X-D
ptnjbrown over 5 years ago
Nice prank, Earl. Now straighten the mirror.
david_42 over 5 years ago
Could easily be true. My head tilts slightly to the left, putting the right ear above the left.
zeexenon over 5 years ago
Mine too - same as a testicle.
Perkycat over 5 years ago
I’m so glad I don’t wear glasses………..one less thing to worry about!
David Huie Green LoveJoyAndPeace over 5 years ago
Few wives are blessed with a husband as helpful as Earl is.
Sad, very sad, for the rest.
ex window inspector over 5 years ago
Earl has x-ray vision to see through her hair
Concretionist over 5 years ago
Everybody (almost) has an asymetrical head. And face. One of the things we humans find attractive is such symmetry, which is why there aren’t more beautiful (looking) people.
My left ear is a tad higher than the other, and, alas, my left eye is a tad lower than the other. So my glasses always look double-crooked.
kathleenhicks62 over 5 years ago
Oh Earl, how could you? You’re going to get straightened right away I think.
Ray over 5 years ago
It’s not at all unusual for one to have one ear higher than the other.