Bliss by Harry Bliss for May 21, 2021

It’s all in the throat

You either got it or you ain’t.

You mean as in “woof my cookies?”

You just did, cat.

The sequel to this is in today’s Non Sequitur.

Well first you’ve got to get in the mood. Stop lying around all day watching birds, and start chasing squirrels.

Are you sure you want to do this ?

“First, you have to locate your ‘inner dog’…”

Two mice are being chased by a cat. One of them turns around and barks at it, scaring it away, then turns to the other mouse and says, “Sometimes it really pays to be bilingual.”

Cats can ‘woof’ but it sounds more like a ‘bark’.

First, Grasshopper, you must learn to “arf”.

Note to the artist: The trees are so regularly spaced as to appear planted. It’s interesting how the human brain notices unnatural patterns.

Why is the cat purple?

I did have a cat who would make a series of short, clipped meows in the same situation where a dog would bark.

“I can teach you the words, but I don’t know if you’ll ever get the music right.” (Apologies to Mark Twain).

A parrot in a near by tree begins to mock the both of them.

That’s a very classified operation, you aren’t cleared for it.

We actually had a cat that tried to bark. He wasn’t very good at it, but he sure tried! We brought a baby kitten into the house with two grown-up dogs. They treated him very gently, and he soon figured out that he was a dog, too. Yeah, he was wrong, but that’s how he saw it. When the dogs ran barking to the door, Rumble would run around going “Whff! Whff! Whff!” At first we thought he was sneezing and then we figured out that, no, he was honestly trying his darnedest to bark. It was pretty funny.

Just say ‘no’ to the ‘Woo’. VERY irritating baseball game ‘tradition’.

I want to freak out the neighborhood dogs.

OK. But you teach me how to purr and meow.

“Start with ‘wrr.’”

Tell ya what, buddy! Nibble on a couple of these toadstools over here, and we’ll bark together!

Have you mastered the warp?

It seems to work for fish too:https://youtu.be/h42Vsea1rmU

Prior to learning how to WOOF, you need to build a foundation, set up a housing frame and then you learn to WOOF your dwelling.