Brewster Rockit by Tim Rickard for April 09, 2019

I’m rolling my eyes right along with you, Pam!

Pam, that was a successful rescue mission, you deserve a medal. But for your tolerance towards Brewster.

“The strangest thing happened to me in there – there was a black stallion walking on his hind legs and talking to me!!!”

He probably literally punched the button.

I wouldn’t rely on him to press the open door button for anyone.

And if it goes sideways…?

Hodor!

See, Pam could have just punched any floor button, and the elevator would bring Brewster right to her floor. But give a man a fish… Not that Brewster could actually learn how to do it. He can’t remember the number 3, after all. This space station gets more interesting all the time. Maybe they could call in those guys in the commercial for remodeling your bathroom without doing any demolition! Pam would be the cackling lady customer (if you’ve seen this commercial).

That’s a retro transport unit.

Elevator manufacturers have even made them so blind people can use them, but they can’t help stupid.

Everything is to complicated for Brewster’s meager mind. How did he get this job?

And yet he knows how to text. Actually you don’t need to be very smart at all to text.

There are many stories in the space station R.U. Sirius.

Don’t get me started on the elevators at our office tower.

Wow! He just materialized on the main deck!

Don’t they have any voice-operated turbolifts? Or some Sirius Cybernetics Happy Vertical People Transporters?

Elevators need to be simplified for the simple.

Call me perverse, call me sophomoric, but I couldn’t get past “Pam, I’m inside.”

Brewster was a smart man till the aliens scrambled it.

No one on Earth wanted to hire him.

At least he still remembers what the number 3 looks like.