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Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for February 21, 2016
Transcript:
Voice on Phone: Tech support. How can I help you? Rat: Yeah, I've loaded your software onto my and now the computer isn't working at all. Voice on Phone: I'm sorry to hear that. Let's see what I can do. Rat: Fine. Voice on Phone: Okay, to begin, I'd like you to check if it's plugged in. Rat: Plugged in? Is it plugged in? Voice on Phone: Yes, sir. Rat: I've waited forty minutes on hold so that some tech guy could ask me that? Voice on Phone: Yes, sir. It's a checklist I have to go through. Rat: Yeah, well here's my checklist.... Item 1: Stop buying software from companies that treat me like a @#$%@# moron! Item 2: Stop wasting forty minutes on hold to speak to someone as useless as you! Sorry, sir, it's just our procedure that I-
BE THIS GUY about 9 years ago
Pig did it.
Sherlock Watson about 9 years ago
(Sad trombone sound)
Templo S.U.D. about 9 years ago
seems like an âF Minusâ
knight1192a about 9 years ago
Well thatâs unusual.
comic4matt about 9 years ago
This happens more often than youâd thinkâŠ
macky87 about 9 years ago
âIs it definitely plugged in?â and âhave you tried turning it off and then on again?â (as said by Roy from âThe IT Crowdâ)."
Me3000 about 9 years ago
I worked IT and this was like every 5th call, and yes I had to tell lots of people I had a checklist and they usually responded that way lol
jeff_e about 9 years ago
That, right there, is a good comic strip.
ursamaj about 9 years ago
Are you IT guys always that clueless?
juicebruce about 9 years ago
I feel for the IT folks who must support some of the garbage that there companies are putting out there: Yahoo and T D Ameritrade are two of themâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠ.If it is not broke please donât fix itâŠâŠâŠPlease donât make us go through 3 steps to do what we where able to do in 1 step beforeâŠâŠâŠâŠ.But then we would not be able to look at all those pretty adds you put in thereâŠâŠâŠâŠâŠ.
Alexander the Good Enough about 9 years ago
Yup. Been there and done that I donât know how many times with users. Of course, over the years, Iâve done a few dumb things too. And even if tech support doesnât have the answer, which is at least half the time, they at least get me thinking about the problem differently, and then I solve it myself. So itâs still worth it.
Sisyphos about 9 years ago
You just made a fool of yourself, Rat. Not that it was a hard thing to doâŠ.May your hard drive fry once you get plugged in!
peggykb9 about 9 years ago
When I first read it, Rat was the one doing tech support and annoying the callerâŠ.
Claire Jordan about 9 years ago
Itâs a real issue. A lot of equipment which takes a kettle-type lead has a very tight socket into which it is difficult to get the lead to engage properly, and the lead may either work loose and fall out or, possibly even worse, work just slightly out of position. If this happens to a monitor it can create very strange effects, such as brown and green stripes across the screen.
Brass Orchid Premium Member about 9 years ago
Sorry sir⊠thatâs a firmware issue.You will have to reflash your head ROM.
dadoctah about 9 years ago
After you shut down and restart, and then reinstall your operating system, the next step in the script is to create a tachyon pulse by reversing the phase polarity, which will modulate the shield frequencies..Doesnât anybody watch ST:TNG?
BumptiousQBangwhistle about 9 years ago
This type of error has a common bug ID. Itâs a 10-T.
BumptiousQBangwhistle about 9 years ago
http://ars.userfriendly.org/cartoons/?id=19990211
Cameron1988 Premium Member about 9 years ago
LOL! LOL! that time it was Ratâs fault!
tom about 9 years ago
I had a customer on the phone like that. âYOUR *(^^ PROGRAM WONâT PRINT!â After 40 minutes of trying to calm him down and figure out what was up, the printer was plugged into another computer. (Before the days of shared printers.)
bbbmorrell about 9 years ago
I worked in IT for a long time. I did not have a checklist (I was a department of one) but checking that the power was on was second only to whether they had rebooted. Thing was, the people stupid enough to have the power off seemed to know they were clueless and never got upset about these kind of questions. I knew it was time to retire when someone said âI guess you must think I am stupid?â and I replied âthat thought had occurred to me.â
Joken' about 9 years ago
Oops
NeedaChuckle Premium Member about 9 years ago
Using the CD/DVD player for a cup holder was always a good way to cause a problem. Yes, they did.
Kristiaan about 9 years ago
Thereâs a reason itâs on the checklist.
jdsween855 Premium Member about 9 years ago
Then there is always the one about a lady calling because the computer isnât working and when the IT guy asked her to check if it was plugged in, she said that she would have to get a flashlight to see. When he asked why, she told him because the power was out. Id10T error. Been there. Help desk was a punishment assignment.
Charlie Fogwhistle about 9 years ago
Step Two â Reboot the computer. A great many problems are solved with that one.
sweetaddietude about 9 years ago
When I worked in the hospital a doctor was trying to use a piece of equipment but he and his nurse practitioner couldnât get it to work. I was called in to help. My first question was, âIs it plugged in?â While the NP got defensive the doc looked down and said, âNope.â
cindyorch about 9 years ago
hahaha ratâŠyou are soooooo stupid!!!!!!! Take that you piece of rat crap you!!!!!
heatherjasper about 9 years ago
Looks like something from notalwaysright.com.
Alida_L about 9 years ago
The same thing happens to me every time I have to call UVerse. Except Iâm always plugged in.
whiteaj about 9 years ago
Not only that, the cord isnât long enough to reach the outlet.
A_NY_Outlaw about 9 years ago
uh oh. someone is gonna get kicked in the oompa-loompas Iâm afraid.
dutchs about 9 years ago
When I was in the Army I heard about a cryptography class where the final exam was to troubleshoot an encryption device. One poor guy struggled for 45 minutes and all the tester had done was pull the plug.
tiomax about 9 years ago
When I was asked to fix a family memberâs computer they would ask âWhatâs wrong?â My response was âJust a loose nut in front of the keyboard!â
codedaddy about 9 years ago
The computer is missing; the power cord runs only to the monitor! Checking to see that the configuration actually includes a computer deserves to be on the moron checklist in addition to the monitor power.
abbybookcase about 9 years ago
pig did it. he was trying to be helpful and cut down on the electric bill
Rush Strong Premium Member about 9 years ago
When I was in IT, we upgraded the H.R. admin assistantâs system from the old green screen to a color monitor. The next morning, we got a support call â no picture. I went to her office and had the pleasure of simply pressing the power button and then witnessing her embarrassment..In all fairness, this lady was a generally pretty sharp cookie. But back in those days of steam powered computers, the monochrome monitors didnât have a power switch â they plugged into a switched outlet on the PC. And the switch on the replacement wasnât very obvious..We both got a kick out of it.
winniepaints about 9 years ago
I LOVE this!!!!! (it happens, but no one will admit it)!
Stream of conscience about 9 years ago
There are people who think a mouse is a foot pedal. People make the darnedest mistakes.
patlaborvi about 9 years ago
I remember reading about an IT call where the customer complained that their screen was blank. The IT guy went through his trouble shooting list and when he got to the question about the computer being pugged in the customer said, âhold on, I have to get a flashlight to check.â âA flashlight?â âYes, weâre in the middle of a power outage here and I need a light.â
patlaborvi about 9 years ago
I remember reading about an IT call where the customer complained that their screen was blank. The IT guy went through his trouble shooting list and when he got to the question about the computer being pugged in the customer said, âhold on, I have to get a flashlight to check.â âA flashlight?â âYes, weâre in the middle of a power outage here and I need a light.â
neatslob Premium Member about 9 years ago
Quite some time ago, a customer called and said his printer wasnât working. My first thought was that it wasnât turned on, but I didnât want to ask him that and make it sound like I thought he was stupid. There were no lights on the outside of this printer, but under the cover there was a status display. I asked him what number was on the status display. He went to check and a minute later came back and said âNever mindâ and hung up.
Martin Kaplan about 9 years ago
I can totally see myself doing something like this!
Jim Kerner about 9 years ago
Oopsie.
gordol about 9 years ago
This is why we Help Desk folks ask those seemingly stupid questions.
Sheila Hardie about 9 years ago
Cats, amirite?
knottytippet about 9 years ago
HAHAHA!
Dillithamir about 9 years ago
Yep⊠every day I see both sides of that.
glowing-steak32 almost 8 years ago
Awkward.
LOAFY about 4 years ago
Tech support has to assume you donât know anything about computers or they could miss an obvious solution. I mean, letâs get real here. Most people who call tech support ARE just that clueless.
LOAFY about 4 years ago
Anyone else reminded of âThe IT Crowdâ?
Kirbo almost 4 years ago
lol got mad for nothing
Luffy almost 4 years ago
Ha ha ha ha ha
Josequeen over 3 years ago
Computers have plugs?
the muppets. almost 2 years ago
Poor guy