For Better or For Worse by Lynn Johnston for March 13, 2018

the truth sure does hurt

“Do you want me to find somewhere else to live?”

This seems like a ridiculous expectation for a punishment until you remember that putting her children out of the house is one of Elly Patterson’s favourite means of punishing her kids. She has a long and rich history of sending her kids outside when they have irritated her and it is recent. Just last December, she sent Michael to stand outside in the snow after he yelled at his cousin Laura at the Cruikshank farm.

Ellie could have handled this situation much better and more kindly. Asking her daughter to simply recount the incident would have disclosed the actual events and she would have been able to assess them more accurately. Ellie immediately takes the position that the child is completely wrong and hiding something from her. Now, her daughter could be less likely to have faith in Ellie ’s belief in her and accurately decide how much to actually tell her mom.

I don’t think Elly handled this badly. She just needs to reassure Elizabeth she won’t be sent out of the house. She didn’t yell at her or anything. I know of mothers who would berate their kids to kingdom come and call them nasty names, humiliate them in front of the family, friends and strangers, and give them horrible punishments besides all this.

Elly is handling this just fine – it is LIZ who is being overly dramatic.

I think someone missed up on what punishment is for. When the kid thinks that the only way to atone for something wrong is to leave. The message of parental punishment has missed its mark.

This is a lesson children seem to learn early – to lie in order to try and escape trouble – and many do not out-grow it in adulthood. Fear of trouble/punishment provokes most people to lie to try and escape what they fear is coming if they tell the truth. Lying also comes easily when people with a conscience feel shame over what they did. In dealing with children it’s important to not punish out of anger, but to be clear why the punishment is happening. In this case it shouldn’t be over the spilled milk but over the lying, and it should be proportional to the event. Not so severe that what the child learns is it isn’t safe to tell the truth. If this is a first time then I’d talk to her and give a warning about lying never helping but makes things worse, and showing it’s safe to come to mommy and tell the truth.

Lizzie’s response made it clear to me that she’s being taught right from wrong. Maybe a bit dramatic in that plea, but knows that the lie was wrong.

Better to stop lying anyway. A while back there was a strip where Elizabeth was concerned about her nose. She probably would not want it to get longer! :)

Another “honesty is the best policy” story. One Saturday morning when I was 6, I was up before everyone, watching TV. I was a little hungry but just wanted a snack. I knew there was a bag of onion rings on top of the ‘fridge, so I figured I’d just have a couple. I ended up finishing the bag! Later that day my mother asked what happened to the onion rings…and I told her. I felt bad & apologized. She told me “don’t do that again”…and it was all good. (Sorry for another nostalgia binge; tomorrow is my mother’s wake, with the funeral the day after.)

My mother would get really mad sometimes, like when I got my best clothes all muddy. She would kick me out of the house. I would walk to the corner and wait. Our neighbor would drive by and tell me I could go home again.

Yes, Lizzie should have told the truth. I knew she would get grounded for lying to her mother. It looks like Liz is running away from home than to face Mom’s wrath. Elly really smart and clever to detect a lying family member.

Yes, Lizzie should have told the truth. I knew she would get grounded for lying to her mother. It looks like Liz is running away from home than to face Mom’s wrath. Elly really smart and clever to detect a lying family member.

Another way to look at it is what if in the future Elizabeth actually does get accosted by muggers? What is she going to tell her mother then, considering she told a whopper before?

There’s “buyer’s remorse”…could this be “liar’s remorse”?

I think the look on Elly’s face in the last panel as she realizes the effect this is having on Liz is the whole point of this strip.

Lynn’s notes tell us that she is definitely on Elly’s side here, though I think she’s often very good at showing both sides:This story was used, I was told, as an example for kids at home and in kindergarten of how a lie can get out of hand. As a parent, I was “lecturing children” from my basement drawing table!

DWEEBS AWAKEN!!!!!! Let’s hear all your worthless comments.

Ol’ Lizardbreath was a prodigy at Guilt Fu…

Elly Hecklers – LIZ is being overly dramatic here. She probably heard somewhere that kids get kicked out of home for doing something bad – most likely teenagers. She thought she would be kicked out for being careless. Kids hear whoopers everyday at school and at Liz’s age, she hasn’t yet learned to separate fiction/exaggerations from reality/common sense. I am a teacher and I’ve heard my students tell outlandish stories.