Pearls Before Swine by Stephan Pastis for January 17, 2020

Just do what George Costanza did: decide what you’re going to do, then do the opposite.

Looks like Rat explained me years ago.

Golly, Rat is better than the seer from a couple days ago.

Rat is practicing Congressional Math.

It calculates the middle class with more than they actually have, therefore to be heavily taxed.

The 1% who contribute large sums to the Congress members’ election funds need assistance, and should have multiple tax breaks.

No $#%+, Einstein.

Example: You take advice from a rat.

Is Rat taking his cue from Lucy van Pelt?

Did I need math to figure that out?

You’re right, Rat. He chose you as a friend.

Five cents please.

Rat we all make stupid choices ,tell me what the Powerball numbers will be for the next drawing ! … Croc Power !

Now you have upset the Millenials.

Why is the world the way it is? Because people are the way they are.

Don’t we all make stupid choices?

Maybe Pig voted for the person Rat didn’t vote for.

Rat is right.

Life is what happens to you as you “screw up” on a daily basis over a long period of time!

Like I needed a mathematical equation to reach that conclusion?

BUT PIG already knows this…..Sigh

Analytics – Astrology for the 21st Century!

Your first stupid choice today, Pig, was getting out of bed.

One of pig’s stupid choices was standing there and listening to rat.

“You’re only human, you’re supposed to make mistakes.”. – Billy Joel

That Rat is definitely getting his stand shut down

Ooh…Rat used numbers. Many numbers. That makes his conclusions settled science.

According to my calculations, your problem is you listen to ignorant people/rats.

Now if we could just figure out what “poor choices” lead to cancer, Alzheimer’s, etc.

First bad choice was by your parents deciding (voluntary or otherwise) to propagate the species. Second was choosing rat as a friend.

Like talking to Rat

Said the Rat who sets up a kiosk which looks strangely like Lucy Van Pelt’s psychiatry stand…

Stupid choices are the natural result of incomplete consideration of all of the variables.

Listening to Rat wasn’t one of Pig’s smarter choices…

I’m sure Rat is glad to be of service, Pig. Of course, it ought to be pretty obvious to anyone who knows you….