Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for March 07, 2020

SAVE ME!

DO A BARREL ROLL!!!

Maybe he was planning to write “Welcome to” and then write the wrong city name just to confuse pilots and passengers.

And everybody thinks he’s so cute & precocious!!

True story: When Marlon Brando was a schoolboy he wrote the word ‘sh**’ on the blackboard in kerosene and set it on fire!

Last frame:“The little MFer isn’t going to tell me what he wanted to write!”

C+H 4EVA

I do…

At least he asked, my brothers would have just done it. They once made rag balls, set them alight and played catch over the top of the house.

“Land here, free parking!”

yep, Dad…some things are better left unsaid!

I bet Dad wants to know and won’t admit it.

Actually, now I’m curious.

“ALIENS LAND HERE!”

As kids we wrote big words in the snow at winter time. Only trouble was the path from the words led to home. Boy oh boy my father was not happy.

I was always doing something with fire when I was young. poured a couple gallons of Dad’s mower gas down a storm drain in the back ally and tossed a match in. Pretty flames shot out of that man hole and the next couple down the ally! Another time, made rocket fuel on Mom’s stove. Melted saltpeter and sugar in a tin can (The old kind, with soldered seams and ends.) on the burner. Solder melted! Ruined stove, burned wall paper behind the stove, burned “popcorn” off spot on ceiling, spilled on floor and burned carpet, filled house with smoke!

Or as they said on Gilligan’s Island, “Look, S-O-L, Sol, they’re honoring you.”

Worst I’ve ever done was prying open our Big Ben alarm clock to see “what made it tick”. The spring sprung out, the clock was ruined, but my parents were OK with it, because I was curious. I was worried there for a while though. No…worst was siphoning gas from a farmer’s tank, curious to see how a siphon works. Was burping up gas fumes all night. A big mistake. Dad was mad because I was stealing gas.

We have a 300 foot long driveway. When we had the house built, I wanted to have center-line lighting installed with sequencing flashes rolling towards the garage (it’s called a “rabbit”). My wife nixed the idea: too close to the airport.

SOS1

Whatever he wrote, the “E” would be backwards…

Just as well…

Our family house was right in the landing pattern of the local airport. We waved at the pilots as they came and went.

“Don’t be ridiculous” … Calvin’s mission is to be ridiculous.

Perhaps “dangeously unsupervised child”?

Calvin just asking for a can of gas is reason enough for his father to say “No!”

Yes you do, Dad…

No you do not want to know.

OK, then; can I borrow your laser pointer?

War & Peace.

One summer, it was my job to water the front lawn. I would sit on the porch with the hose sprayer and make sure the whole lawn was covered. Then I’d spell out “TOM” a couple times. (Tentoes would not have fit) Sure enough! Before long you could read my name in the grass. Dad thought it was clever. Mom was not amused. The next year Dad watered the front lawn.

Can I just point out that Calvin is still awake at 8:00 at night?

Send lawyers guns and money.

I have lots of lawn, and passenger airplanes from two airports often fly over at a low altitude. I’ve been really tempted to write “Hi” with fertilizer more than once. The elderly neighbors called in a panic, once, because they’d heard a huge explosive noise on their roof. I went over. No damage, thank heavens, so I doubted it was a meteorite. My guess was blue ice, aka a poopcicle, from one of those planes.

I do

“TAKE ME TO YOUR LEADER—-PLEASE?”

“Empty your tanks!”

I want to know!

Or maybe he meant something else, it was probably saying, Aliens do not fear, you are safe here

NEW DAD WANTED, maybe..