Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for July 19, 2021

No. 1 Rule in golf. The guy with the bucket hat always loses.

“I said, pull my finger, not bite it!”

A foursome on Saturday and match play between Hendrix and bucket hat with caddies today? Or is Heather’s head in the foreground and a tight third panel blocking the other players (and caddies?) from being seen?

Did the other two player’s BS meters go off and they decided to bug out of Hendrix’s scam?

The dull green Milford CC grass and drab gray figures of the golfers portends another dreary story arc

In all reality , it’s Mel Gibson not Carter Hendrix ! Come on Coach get with it , you know a lot of people told me you’re going senile .

This Sunday’s Star Headline: “Golfgate: The Hole Truth” by Woodward & Burns-tein.

What’s special about Hendricks gin?Hendrick’s unique flavor comes from its use of 13 ingredients: Bulgarian roses, cucumbers, and 11 botanicals, including juniper, coriander, orange, lemon, angelic, orris root, cubeb berries, caraway seeds, chamomile, elderflower, and yarrow.

This is a friend in waiting for Marty. Think of the great fun these two could have at Milford Downs. And the product Moon could absorb.

Abandoned on the practice green, Gil’s class of junior golfers has by now gone feral. They have established a lair in the bunker of the twelfth fairway, and they will prey upon all foursomes who seem especially vulnerable. Carter Hendricks’ feigned injury will therefore turn out to be his undoing, and the consequences will be far greater than a two-stroke handicap.

I’m calling BS on his finger injury. Even if he really did cut it, look where the pad part of it is. On the top of his finger. Where he is not contacting the club. Hustle alert!

And speaking of hustle, you should hustle over to Mopped Up Thorp and catch it while it’s hot.

https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/

You’d be better off if you stopped talking during your swing, Carter.

P1, Ever been kneecapped, Hendricks? Now that’s an injury!

P2, Gil does his Carnac routine, answering the question before Heather asks it.

Heather, “Who’s that dick?”

P3, It’s The Flying Fickle Finger Of Fate, right Hendricks?

I fail to see how ironing his clothes would improve his chances.

At least Gil is back to his black and blue hair.

Gil can read Heather’s mind

P 1.5: “…but I’m still not as hurt or as good as that 1-arm guy who shoots under par every time he comes out here…”

I think Heather would be much better off taking a waitress job at The Diner.

P 2: “…I heard that you had a couple of kids…..is that one of them?…”

P1,5- Hi Heather. I’m Carter. Wanna kiss my boo boo?

PressPress

Pull!

Curley Howard, 1938