Well, I’ve picked on Jews, soldiers, and the CIA in the last few days. I think I’ll switch my focus to Christians:
A minister is preparing his sermon for Sunday. He tells his wife he plans to speak about sex. “Oh, I don’t think you should do that, Dear,” his wife says. “That’s a very private, personal subject. Please choose some other subject to preach about.”
“Hmmm,” the preacher says. “I suppose I could talk about running a marathon.”
“You do that, Darling. That’s a much better subject than sex.”
As luck would have it, the wife fell ill, and wasn’t able to go with her husband to church. So, freed of his wife’s supervision, he reverts to his original subject, sex.
Later in the week, after she had recovered, the minister’s wife meets with a couple of her ladyfriends from church. “We’re so sorry you missed your husband’s sermon Sunday. He spoke with such power and authority – it was wonderful!”
“Well, that IS amazing,” says the preacher’s wife, “considering that he only tried it twice, couldn’t finish either time, and threw up after his second attempt.”
Another part of the use of the Interstate Highway System was to move military equipment and supplies, Eisenhower having been inspired by the German Autobahn.
If I’m going to take inspiration from the topics provided by RBION, here’s one concerning Life after nuclear war.
The year is 2097. In the midst of a nuclear war, two babies are sent from Earth in a pod to an empty SpaceX bunker on Mars in the hopes they will survive and continue the human race.
After years in isolation and with packaged food becoming scarce, the young humans decided to venture out onto the planet’s surface and try to establish a civilization.
They began drilling through the crust and discovered lakes of water, something they’d never seen before. Soon they were planting crops and irrigating water to the surface where new life forms were created and thriving.
Then, one day as they were digging up their harvest, one of them noticed something completely foreign and amazing in the sky: A cloud. The human stared in awe at this massive spectacle floating through the barren Mars atmosphere. After a while, the cloud neared and began drizzling water all across their fields.
With haste, the first human raced back to the bunker and exclaimed, “It’s happening, just like the books said it would! It’s raining!”
The second human, not raising his eyes from the paper, lowered his coffee and replied, “We needed it.”
After buying a new car insurance policy, Lydia McCracken and her grandparents met an Australian cassowary also 8,000 miles from home. They were identified by dental records and DNA.
The American interstate system is copy of the German autobaum which was supposed to not only provide a fast travel system between fronts but also serve as aircraft runways with the overpasses serving as hangers and places to hide and protect aircraft from aerial attack.
One of the AM radio stations I worked for (middle of a cow pasture in northeast Tennessee) had nightly visits from an emu that was supposed to live in a local petting zoo. Seemed to have an affinity for cattle feed.
Eisenhower was the force behind building the Interstate Highway System, along with expansion of other social programs from the FDR and Truman Administrations. Many conservatives opposed the spending for the Interstate, calling Ike a ‘socialist’, some even called him a communist. FDR initiated the Federal-Aid Highway Act of 1944, stalled in congress. Ike renewed the Act and signed it into law.
eromlig about 3 years ago
Well, I’ve picked on Jews, soldiers, and the CIA in the last few days. I think I’ll switch my focus to Christians:
A minister is preparing his sermon for Sunday. He tells his wife he plans to speak about sex. “Oh, I don’t think you should do that, Dear,” his wife says. “That’s a very private, personal subject. Please choose some other subject to preach about.”
“Hmmm,” the preacher says. “I suppose I could talk about running a marathon.”
“You do that, Darling. That’s a much better subject than sex.”
As luck would have it, the wife fell ill, and wasn’t able to go with her husband to church. So, freed of his wife’s supervision, he reverts to his original subject, sex.
Later in the week, after she had recovered, the minister’s wife meets with a couple of her ladyfriends from church. “We’re so sorry you missed your husband’s sermon Sunday. He spoke with such power and authority – it was wonderful!”
“Well, that IS amazing,” says the preacher’s wife, “considering that he only tried it twice, couldn’t finish either time, and threw up after his second attempt.”
Charlie Fogwhistle about 3 years ago
Another part of the use of the Interstate Highway System was to move military equipment and supplies, Eisenhower having been inspired by the German Autobahn.
Charlie Fogwhistle about 3 years ago
If I’m going to take inspiration from the topics provided by RBION, here’s one concerning Life after nuclear war.
The year is 2097. In the midst of a nuclear war, two babies are sent from Earth in a pod to an empty SpaceX bunker on Mars in the hopes they will survive and continue the human race.
After years in isolation and with packaged food becoming scarce, the young humans decided to venture out onto the planet’s surface and try to establish a civilization.
They began drilling through the crust and discovered lakes of water, something they’d never seen before. Soon they were planting crops and irrigating water to the surface where new life forms were created and thriving.
Then, one day as they were digging up their harvest, one of them noticed something completely foreign and amazing in the sky: A cloud. The human stared in awe at this massive spectacle floating through the barren Mars atmosphere. After a while, the cloud neared and began drizzling water all across their fields.
With haste, the first human raced back to the bunker and exclaimed, “It’s happening, just like the books said it would! It’s raining!”
The second human, not raising his eyes from the paper, lowered his coffee and replied, “We needed it.”
Templo S.U.D. about 3 years ago
How does interstate work on isolated Hawaii? It’s in the middle of the ocean!
pearlsbs about 3 years ago
There are emu ranches in the United States. It’s not so hard to believe.
Caldonia about 3 years ago
Something tells me taking an exit won’t keep you safe from nuclear fallout. But I’m no scientist.
Pedmar Premium Member about 3 years ago
Is emu pronounced e-myoo or e-moo?
Count Olaf Premium Member about 3 years ago
After buying a new car insurance policy, Lydia McCracken and her grandparents met an Australian cassowary also 8,000 miles from home. They were identified by dental records and DNA.
Count Olaf Premium Member about 3 years ago
The American interstate system is copy of the German autobaum which was supposed to not only provide a fast travel system between fronts but also serve as aircraft runways with the overpasses serving as hangers and places to hide and protect aircraft from aerial attack.
therese_callahan2002 about 3 years ago
Did it offer them Liberty Mutual, and say, “Only pay for what you need?” I’ll bet poor Doug was looking on.
Cminuscomics&stories Premium Member about 3 years ago
There would be such a traffic jam that it would be faster to walk.
NeedaChuckle Premium Member about 3 years ago
Let loose the McCrackens!!!
khmo about 3 years ago
Every 5 miles is a straight stretch then suitable as a runway.
John Wiley Premium Member about 3 years ago
One of the AM radio stations I worked for (middle of a cow pasture in northeast Tennessee) had nightly visits from an emu that was supposed to live in a local petting zoo. Seemed to have an affinity for cattle feed.
Huckleberry Hiroshima about 3 years ago
….. (hang on, still yawning……..)….
Take care, may esteemed somnambulist Fred “ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ” Snorezord be with you, and gesundheit.
Pickled Pete about 3 years ago
I don’t yawn anymore, and my head continually does feel rather tight ..
comixbomix about 3 years ago
Those people will do anything to sell you insurance.
markhughw about 3 years ago
(yawn)
e.groves about 3 years ago
Happy Birthday to any Marines here. Semper Fi!
petermerck about 3 years ago
I know there were less cars in the 50’s but evac from a hurricane the interstate is a parking lot.
poppacapsmokeblower about 3 years ago
Emu farms can be anywhere, and corralling emu isn’t easy.
Lafsalot about 3 years ago
It wasn’t an Emu. It was William Frawley.
mindjob about 3 years ago
Is Emu farming like Ostrich farming? It was popular for a while and the meat is good, not like poultry
joeatwork212 about 3 years ago
Happy Birthday to all of the Jarheads out there.
ncorgbl about 3 years ago
Eisenhower was the force behind building the Interstate Highway System, along with expansion of other social programs from the FDR and Truman Administrations. Many conservatives opposed the spending for the Interstate, calling Ike a ‘socialist’, some even called him a communist. FDR initiated the Federal-Aid Highway Act of 1944, stalled in congress. Ike renewed the Act and signed it into law.
drewhollan about 3 years ago
IT WAS ALSO DESIGNED TO BE AIRSTRIPS, THANKS TO PRES. EISENHOWER!!
moondog42 Premium Member about 3 years ago
At the time the interstate system was created, we were more likely to nuke ourselves with all the “Operation Plowshare” going on.
globalenterprize1990 about 3 years ago
The emu was obviously someone’s exotic pet.
lawguy05 about 3 years ago
Emus are raised for commercial purposes in many states. I’m sure Colorado has its share of Emu “ranchers.”
jbcuster about 3 years ago
I have heard that owning an emu/emus was a popular “thing” for awhile but when the owners tired of them they just released them into the wild.
dlestersprint0 about 3 years ago
I 19 runs south from Tucson, AZ to Nogales, AZ about 60 miles. It’s road signs are metric. The only road in the U.S. to be so marked.
edeevans1947 about 3 years ago
The other part for it’s existance was for the more rapid movement of military personnel and weapons!
pbr50138 about 3 years ago
I wonder if that yawn thing goes for people too? If so, I’m sure there’s 70,000,000+ people that haven’t yawned in many years.
WDD about 3 years ago
An emu that would approach humans probably came from a zoo, however far away, in the United States.