That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for December 21, 2021

“Yeah, it was a real cold day when I painted this male nude.”

The leopard skin rug? That’s here for the porno I’m making tomorrow.

Carl chatting with his new beard model.

Nicholas: What is this? When I posed for you I was wearing that leopard-skin. Why’d you change it?

Carl: The men who commissioned the painting insisted on red and white fur, their logo colors. And you aren’t drinking from a wineskin anymore. Now it’s a Coca-Cola.

ZZ Topp goes to art school

/// It’s exactly as I always feared,

with no girlfriend, they think that I’m weird.

I’ve lived my whole life

without taking a wife.

Ask your model if she’ll be my beard.

/// Late in life they would paint, on a lark,

scenes of lung disease, morbid and dark.

Lived on money folks paid

for the Cough Drops they’d made

as the Smith Brothers pair, Trade and Mark.

Your paintings are so life like, except when you get to the naughty bits. Then it get’s all splotchy and the canvas is torn.

Said the painter, “don’t make me laugh -

I’d be wasting my talent by half !”

But the client intruded..

So the portrait included

The dead leopard’s epitaph.

You deserved worse than just the finger!

“I cut off the bottom half of my beard and made it into a toupee. You should try it.”

so, the head of the family goes to see a talent agent…

“I must say Carl, you are so right….no stems, no seeds that you don’t need…this Acapulco Gold is some bad ass weed!”

corned beef, Swiss cheese, sauerkraut, and Russian dressing, etc. :-)

Trust me Ephram, when your beard is as heavy as mine you’ll have to sit down too.

A Jackson Pollock you say?

“Your only hope is to convince the world that you’ve developed a new, extraordinary way of seeing the reality of the world. Or, maybe cut your ear off?”

“So, its agreed, then. You may marry my daughter once she turns sixteen.”

“I think you misunderstood me when I asked you to come over and help paint my house.”

You should trim your beard and use that hair as a toupee.

“But that doesn’t explain why she has a beard.”

Aren’t you taking a bit of artistic license painting that leopard that way?

The Painter in His Studio: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Carl_Johann_Spielter_-_Im_Atelier.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this roughly jumbo envelope size painting. Other versions has the strip coloration image.

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at 

http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2021/12/masterpiece-2847.html 

I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. So far, 4 works, by this artist, have been used here. 

https://www.gocomics.com/that-is-priceless/2021/03/16?comments=visible 

has the prior (the here link in the blog comment was pointed to as artist info URL in my comment there).

Looks like the cat’s out of the bag now Carl!

I’ve been meaning to ask you … have you been getting those useless advertisements from DollarShaveClub in the mail too?

It’s a new trend. Sending a painting of yourself to everybody you know as a Christmas present. You should try it!

At the sanitarium musicale, the doctor holds a stringless zither while Sir George plays his imaginary violin.