That is Priceless by Steve Melcher for January 04, 2022

The dog was the only one worth a portrait in that family.

“A bowl of kibble and dish of water is all I want. But the literature professor leaves me with a copy of Pride and Prejudice.

/// Since the dog isn’t pure-blood, but mixed,

his cruel mistress thought breeding was nixed.

But it’s callous as heck

that she’d hang round his neck

what was cut off when doggie was fixed.

The invisible man and his dog

After his first three kills, Rex had to wear a bell so that the mailman could hear him coming.

I knew Border Collies were smart, but I didn’t realize that they were literate.

/// The aroma of books can’t be beat.

New or old, an olfactory treat.

And yet Liebling, the hound,

seeks out smells more profound

from the wooden chair’s seldom cleaned seat.

The artist carried this painting around in his wallet to impress the ladies with his love for dogs…

A book what’s it for?

You asked me before

In this house of an illiterate

It’s a book’s solemn fate

To mop up should Rex wet the floor

(once more, once more…)

“Ahh poor guy. He always breaks up when he gets to the part where they have to shoot Old Yeller.”

“Old Shep”, wondering “Who Wrote the Book of Love ?”

“ ‘Once upon a midnight dreary/

while I pondered, weak and weary/

over many a quaint and curious volume of forgotten lore…’

But why bother? They’ll never believe a dog wrote it…Oh, what the hell..I’ll just slap it down anyway..”

The chair, while supremely ornate

Was a treasure, beyond all debate..

But the true treasure (tribal)

Was the old family Bible..

The Bible that Bowser ate…

“Jesus H. Christ – another Harry Potter. Don’t these people ever read anything worthwhile?”

“Sit, Ubu, Sit. Good Dog.”

his master’s joyce…

If I hung this painting in my house, at first glance everyone would think it was of my dog Casey. They are surprisingly very similar. “I’ve taught my dog everything I know, but he still don’t know nothin’.” I don’t remember the comedian that said that, but my Dad and I have always thought that a funny line.

There’s a perfectly good bookmark there, yet somehow the pages end up dog-eared anyway.

The RCA dog earlier in his career

Oreo waiting for his master to finish peeing already and finish Oreo’s bedtime story – The Hound of the Baskervilles.

He’s a good boi!

Victor, before the phonograph

Every time he read a book, he left most of the pages ‘dog-earred’.

Dog’s mind: How long does it take to fill dog food in a bowl?

Looks a bit like our neighbor’s dog who occasionally darts across their electric perimeter to chase deer. Then, smart boy, he comes crawling across our deck because he knows husband will take the collar off and walk him home.

Rex needs to borrow one of Heathcliff’s Robots.

Rex was bored. Oh, so bored.

If only he had something to chew on….

" Oh sure, it’s o.k. for him to drop everything and race to the bathroom. Me? I’ve got to sit here and patiently wait ’til the idiot gets done and hope he realizes I have needs, too! "

“Sitz sich! Bleib! Sehe ich aus wie ein Deutcher Schaeferhund, Karl?”

“I knew Master was upset about his slippers, but to actually piddle on my collected works of Benji…!”

The dog licks his paws to turn the pages. He leaves paw prints in all of the books he reads.

The Darling of the Family: 

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Carl_Reichert_Der_Liebling_der_Familie_1915.jpg 

has info and links that point to more info about this roughly US letter size painting.

 

Again, a larger strip image is shown by (⌘- or Ctrl-) clicking the image at 

http://thatispriceless.blogspot.com/2022/01/masterpiece-2855.html 

I have added a comment there (awaiting Mr. Melcher’s approval) pointing to the artist info I used to point to here. First work by this artist used here.

A dog named “Charles Barkley”. The famous Hound of the Basketballs”.

“They say it’s a great book – yup, yup / And it’s where I can reach it – yup, yup / Though I can’t really use it / I just can’t refuse it / so I think I’ll just chew the thing up!”

Three words Rex. Books on tape. That’s a good boy!

Wait, what? When I took this job as a seeing eye dog, I thought the only thing I would be doing is lead him around. Nobody said anything about reading to him.

fido, having finnished his 4th book on human training, is ready to start with the man that calls himself my master. we’ll see about that!

The following is todays work by “sisterskite” AKA Bethramrz. She could have posted it at 4 PM but did not. I’m posting it, without her knowledge, because I think it’s that good:

A dog’s always in a good mood/-Isn’t fussy about his food/when you get home at night/ he will jump with delight/ and he never drinks beer in the nude/// A dog is a woman’s best friend /though a slipper or two he may rend/ he will always be there/ and he’ll never compare /your form to another’s rear end/// The canine heart may be won/ with a toy, or a walk in the sun../ Other crotches he’ll sniff / but you’ll never find “Biff”/ with another girl “Just having fun”../// Though he may sometimes mangle your shoe/ the canine is loyal and true / far from fickle is he: / he may sniff at a tree/ but will always return to you../// In short, a dog’s your best bet/ if you want someone steady to pet:/ he is easy to feed /when you call, he will heed / – and you may meet a very nice vet !

Although the book may have been written by his master, he still could not hear his master’s voice.