Frazz by Jef Mallett for May 09, 2022

I hear there’s this new thing called “sliced bread”, right from the store!!

Uh, not (really) possible to slice toast. You can slice bread and then make toast from it but I’ve never heard of making toast and then slicing it – and if you already have toast, you don’t need to put it in a toaster. I assume he is referring to slicing bread for toast, but how many people do that? Certainly not enough that it’s a good way to judge people.

It says “buy regular sliced bread, you bougie jacka$$.”

He probably doesn’t split the English Muffins either.

The BEST toaster I ever had (in terms of the excellence of the product) was a device that toasted one side of the bread over the open fire, then with a flip, toasted the other side. Worked on a wood cook-stove too. Not as convenient as an electric toaster, and when I moved to town, I left the toast-maker to the next tenant of the cabin, so I have no idea where it is now.

These days, we toast in a “toaster and baker countertop oven” device. It’s not a very good toaster though it works… but it’s really good at melting cheese on bread!

If you want bread slices that thick, just buy Texas toast sliced bread. They are cut twice as thick as normal slices.

Not having to worry about getting things stuck is one of many reasons why I have a toaster oven.

When your toaster oven isn’t big enough.

they sell sliced bread now, you know

Pedanticism in full force today.

Remember: Once bread becomes toast, it will never be bread again.

Do they sell bread that’s not already sliced? I’ve never seen it. I make my own bread, and it’s heavenly when toasted.

I refuse to buy sliced bread. It is sliced too thin and gets stale faster.

Fun fact for those complaining about why he doesn’t eat “regular sliced bread” – did you know that in Ireland, Subway had to change their bread recipe, since the sugar content of their normal stuff is so high, it’s actually classed as a confection? So yes, back home in Ireland, Subway bread is legally “cake.”

Who slices their own bread?

I have had to make toast on the stove when power was out. Works just as well and takes about the amount of time.