Gil Thorp by Henry Barajas and Rachel Merrill for June 04, 2022

Yeah, there’s nothing wrong with high school sports wonks knowing about sports history. Hell, want to know a bit about every player in history? Wikipedia and Google are right there. (It’s replicating Duren’s stunts in high school that bother me, not these kids knowing about him.)

What if he can’t see the batters box even with thick glasses. I’m Sorry I wish the arc could end and we could head on to the golf and Country Club.

Horrible suggestion. This may end with an opposing player charging the mound and both benches clearing. Do these historians also know about Johnny Roseboro and Juan Marichal?

Who could have seen (pun intended) this story arc coming?!

P2: Scoooooter goes full on troll as Charis describes his, ahem, “attributes.”

Mr. Trivia? Barry Bader, Jr.? Does this kid know the Cow Judges son? Will ANYONE make something happen? Prediction. No new body cavities in the road hole bunker at MCC for this storyline.

Get thicker glasses and a stronger prescription! What a great idea!

So Cloris is suggesting veiled threats of bodily harm to opposing batters. Yeah, that’s what HS sports is all about.

P2.5 “I know you can’t really see this Gregggg, but did you know yappy chihuahuas have ones that are this big?”

Greggg has a bright future as a room monitor during Finals.

P1 Had to do a double-take, was wondering what was growing out of Charissss’s head, maybe some Medusa shakes, but then realized it was silhouetted branches in the background

P4 “Great idea, do I still have to wear the goofy mask too?”

P 3: “… are you readers tired of this story yet? I know that I am…”

Today’s depictions of Ccharis and Sscooter give new meaning to the old military order, “Don’t shoot till you see the whites of their eyes.”

I guess the opposing batters will be too terrified to bunt.

P2 is the ultimate low hanging fruit.

Do they really think Gil is going to send him out there again??

Well, if you can’t do actual violence, then fall back on the threat of violence. Works every time.

Soooooo stupid. Of course the coaches are never at all part of any team/player strategy. Is this just a waste of time anyway? Because after the debacle of last game, there’s no way in hell that Gillll would ever let him pitch again, since it’s almost guaranteeing a loss. What’s that? Gillll wouldn’t be caught dead ever employing a strategy of any kind, or make an adjustment? He’ll just let the kid get embarrassed every time he pitches because of his eye doctor’s plea about it being his last chance to ever pitch again? Barrrrrrrrf.

And speaking of barf, I’ve just barfed up another edition of Mopped Up Thorp: https://moppedupthorp.wordpress.com/

P2: What is he doing back there with that look on his face?!?

This is the same kind of strategy the other dude told the base runner. That didn’t work…