Moderately Confused by Jeff Stahler for June 25, 2022

Mom always said the mosquitoes liked her better than dad and myself.

Female infighting

That sucks…

At least they put you back when they were through with you.

You have fulfilled your ecological niche.

Should I get out the Benadryl?

Was she doing what the bears do?

If she fed all of them they can frolic in peace for the rest of the night

The 8 things that attract mosquitoes:

Sweat

Dark Clothing

People who eat a lot of potassium and salt

Perfume and Scented Lotions

Drinking Alcohol

Blood type

Pregnant Woman

Body temperature

And you wonder why you were the Mosquito Cafe.

Ok. I just sat here and fed the ticks.

The soul of a real camper.

Plus, you got that outdoorsy buzz while soaked in Deet. Wait until you get the joy of becoming proficient with emergency First Aid using the anemic but cute kit from your insurance agent. Ah, the memories.

Which is why the wife and daughters prefer roughing it in the restaurant of the Ahwahnee and not feeding a Luftstaffel of hungry mosqitoes.

You fed those mosquitoes. They left a Yelp review, declared you delicious, and their friends are coming over.

When I was going through chemotherapy in 2001 I’d walk with friends and family through the woods during archery tournaments and the skeeters would eat them alive and not touch me. Must have sensed my veins were flowing with poison.

40% DEET works fine.