Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for July 23, 2022

  1. Avatar92
    Charlie Fogwhistle  over 2 years ago

    John was sitting outside his local pub one day, enjoying a quiet pint and generally feeling good about himself, when a nun suddenly appears at his table and starts decrying the evils of drink.

    “You should be ashamed of yourself young man! Drinking is a Sin! Alcohol is the blood of the devil!”

    Now John gets pretty annoyed about this, and goes on the offensive.

    “How do you know this, Sister?”

    “My Mother Superior told me so.”

    “But have you ever had a drink yourself? How can you be sure that what you are saying is right?”

    “Don’t be ridiculous—of course I have never taken alcohol myself”

    “Then let me buy you a drink – if you still believe afterwards that it is evil I will give up drink for life”

    “How could I, a Nun, sit outside this public house drinking?!”

    “I’ll get the barman to put it in a teacup for you, then no one will ever know.”

    The Nun reluctantly agrees, so John goes inside to the bar.

    “Another pint for me, and a triple vodka on the rocks”, then he lowers his voice and says to the barman “and could you put the vodka in a teacup?”

    “Oh no! It’s not that Nun again is it?”

    Until next time.

     •  Reply
  2. Avatar92
    Charlie Fogwhistle  over 2 years ago

    On earth: A magician puts his hand in his hat.In the rabbit realm: The Hand emerges. It is time. The rabbit council must choose another sacrifice.

     •  Reply
  3. Avatar92
    Charlie Fogwhistle  over 2 years ago

    There’s a lot of great magic jokes, and I may have used this one before. But I think it’s been a while.

    A magician stops a woman on a street….“Pick a card, any card” he says. She grabs one at random.

    “Now, look away and memorize that card. Don’t show me.”

    She turns away, memorizes it, and turns back to see that the man was gone.

    She lived her life as any other. She got a job, fell in love, got married, and got pregnant with her first child.

    Fast forward 9 months.

    “Push, PUSH” the midwife and doctors urged. “You’re almost there!”

    “The baby! She’s crowning!”

    “But… what’s that in her HAND???”

    “It… it looks like…”

    “Is THIS your card?” a familiar voice said.

    Until next time.

     •  Reply
  4. B986e866 14d0 4607 bdb4 5d76d7b56ddb
    Templo S.U.D.  over 2 years ago

    That feline float… is it Felix?

     •  Reply
  5. Cyan
    monkeysky  over 2 years ago

    Not only were the balloons released, but there was a substantial cash reward for anyone who found and returned them after they drifted back down to Earth, which was presented as a game by Macy’s.

    The first Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade balloons were designed by Tony Sarg, a puppeteer, interior designer, illustrator and very early animated filmmaker. They were built by his student, Bil Baird, another puppeteer who went on to be extremely famous for his puppet designs and performances. If you’ve ever seen the film The Sound of Music, you probably remember some of Baird’s work.

     •  Reply
  6. 0804242
    James Wolfenstein  over 2 years ago

    The secrets to David Copperfield’s magic tricks have been posted on YouTube :D

     •  Reply
  7. Th bugs 1
    kucpa Premium Member over 2 years ago

    Margaret Thatcher researched ice cream cones? Or was that Targaret Matcher?

     •  Reply
  8. Googly eyes
    John Wiley Premium Member over 2 years ago

    I like the parade balloon in the lower panel.

     •  Reply
  9. Missing large
    yangeldf  over 2 years ago

    how many sea turtles would a Macy’s balloon kill?

     •  Reply
  10. Captain smokeblower
    poppacapsmokeblower  over 2 years ago

    If the young Ms. Thatcher got paid to research ice cream I’m owed some serious back pay.

     •  Reply
  11. A common  tater
    A Common 'tator  over 2 years ago

    Margaret Thatcher

    The longest-serving British prime minister of the 20th century, she was the first woman to hold that office. She was also a barrister in a previous life. Her father ran a small family grocer’s. Her family gave sanctuary to a teenage Jewish girl who had escaped Nazi Germany. The ice-cream research lab she worked in belonged to J.Lyons & Co, the famous Lyon’s Corner house chain…

     •  Reply
  12. Greg backlit
    mindjob  over 2 years ago

    Thatcher got into politics because she ran out of other people’s ice cream

     •  Reply
  13. Missing large
    heathcliff2  over 2 years ago

    Could explain why she looked good for so long. Also, could explain why she was filled with iron.

     •  Reply
  14. Dr horrible pinkraygun
    cupertino jay  over 2 years ago

    wikiwikie keyword briefly a foodie..>Thatcher studied chemistry at Somerville College, Oxford, and worked briefly as a research chemist, before becoming a barrister. She was elected Member of Parliament for Finchley in 1959.

     •  Reply
  15. Huckandfish
    Huckleberry Hiroshima  over 2 years ago

    Copperfield’s silliest “magic” was having a paid “audience” sign non disclosure agreements as he made a large airplane “disappear” by moving a camera with a fake background to a spot where the plane was not sitting.. as they gasped with “amazement” on cue.

    Take care, may blushing but adamant Bible translator Monsignor Enrique “Hey, In The Original Aramaic He Was A Nice Guy But Boring So We Fixed That” Liord be with you, and gesundheit.

     •  Reply
  16. Loudly crying face 1f62d
    I'm Sad  over 2 years ago

    This was very funny!! I love how all three things were all connected to each other in a way!! Good drawing!!!

     •  Reply
  17. Fdr avatar 6d9910b68a3c 128
    Teto85 Premium Member over 2 years ago

    And yet after find out how good ice cream and milk was for people she stole milk from school children.

     •  Reply
  18. Win 20201204 12 32 23 pro
    oakie817  over 2 years ago

    you mean those balloons are still up there?

     •  Reply
  19. Bluedog
    Bilan  over 2 years ago

    They had to stop letting the balloons float away when Krazy Kat shutdown LaGuardia for several hours. /s

     •  Reply
  20. Avatar92
    Charlie Fogwhistle  over 2 years ago

    Did you hear that NASA found bones on the moon?

    The cow didn’t make it.

     •  Reply
Sign in to comment

More From Ripley's Believe It or Not