Ripley's Believe It or Not by Ripley’s Believe It or Not! for January 13, 2023

So as a Brit, Daniel has made £77,948,560 (or £78,948,560 by Jason’s standards) playing Harry?

I think it all depends on which end of the person or dog you take the hair sample from. I’ve see dogs with little nuggets stuck to the rear hairs.

Daniel spent a lot on income tax.

Radcliffe could have bought his own castle, plus a few nonflying broomsticks and his own white owl.

And that is why the children cry and scream and wee-wee on Santa’s lap. “He’s filthy, Mom. Dear gawd he’s FILTHY.”

Take care, may hairy potter Lester “The Spinning Wheel Is My Daily High” Vaselord be with you, and gesundheit.

Looks to me like Daniel could use one of those Gillette sets.

I guess people didn’t know that Gillette is the best a man can get…

Some of the beards I’ve seen back that one up.

Buddy…I mean Daniel…can you spare a dime?

How are ya fixed for blades? Who remembers the Gillette parrot?

It’s good to be back, but now cautious to say anything. How is this right?

I’m good. I shave every morning, weekends, holidays & vacations included.

Off the top of my head…if Radcliffe spent $1000 a day, it would take him 260 years to spend it all (not counting the interest he would earn). Am I right?

When I shave I look great. Its just the rest of me that looks like heck

A friend of mine has a job at the Tickle Me Elmo factory. He’s in Quality Control and at the end of the assembly line and he gives each Elmo a couple of test tickles before they put him in the box.

An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. “You don’t want to try these techniques at home.”“Why not?” asked someone from the audience.“I watched my wife’s routine at breakfast for years,” explained the expert. “She made lots of trips between the fridge, stove, table and cabinets, often just carrying a single item at a time. One day I told her, ‘Hon, why don’t you try carrying several things at once?’”“Did it save time?” the guy in the audience asked.“Actually, yes.” replied the expert…“It used to take her 20 minutes to make breakfast and now I can do it in seven.”

It’s true about beards, that’s why you never see people petting a guys beard.

Anyone up for another golf joke? Pykiff said he liked my other one so giddyap! What should you do if your round of golf is interrupted by a lightning storm?Walk around holding your 1-iron above your head, because even Mother Nature can’t hit a 1-iron. OK. I gotta go!

another marriage joke:-….. A husband and wife came for counseling after 20 years of marriage. When asked by the councellor what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 20 years they had been married.

She went on and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured over the course of their marriage.

Finally, after allowing this to go on for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and, after asking the wife to stand, embraced and kissed her passionately as her husband watched with a raised eyebrow. The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze.

The therapist turned to the husband and said, “This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do this?”

The husband thought for a moment and replied, “Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I go fishing with my mates.”

Birdman out.

Hahahaha.. Good one!

R.I.P. Robbie Coltrane!

And that’s why I shampoo my beard, whenever I shower.