Non Sequitur by Wiley Miller for January 28, 2023

With the straight bottom, those are speed skates. All they do is go straight, they don’t turn. Figure eights are impossible

I think there’s about to be a brief pause in the exercise routine.

Looks like a three leg dog, we have a three leg dog, really.

How about skating in circle until the ice breaks and you fall in the hole. (I saw Daffy Duck do it once.)

I can only imagine…

Are we sure he’s talking about skating figure eights?

Breed? A Sal-chow, of course.

He could still do a double axle.

In training for Olympic Speed Sniffing. Expedited peeing being an important component. Accuracy affects the scoring.

Skis for dogs???

I’m disappointed nobody is confessing to peeing figure eights when they were kids

My record for doing figure eights on ice is perfect — but wasn’t ever the conscious goal.

S-o-o-o=o If dog takes a run around that hydrant, will his owner have to change to the soprano section of the choir?

Fwiw it takes a lot of water to write my name

Brings a new meaning to Death of Guitar Pop’s song: DOGP Shuffle.

I once went skatejuring with a pair of huskies while on in-line roller skates—me not the dogs. We hit a down-hill hairpin curve. Right before it you could see the dogs looking at each other and saying: “crack the whip”.

But ‘leg hikes’ are allowed.

And this is why I live in the South!

New dance; skating the dog…

DUMB.

The deadly yellow snow crystals had

Deprived him of his sight

And he stood up, and he looked around, and he said

“I can’t see”

Soon to be added to the Iditarod as an alternative way to run the race.

Bottom line here is NOBODY remembers why it’s called “Figure Skating”.

A dog’s just gotta do what a dog’s gotta do!